Rachel: Can I ask you a question? Was it me, or was the guy who took my blood sample really cute? You know who I'm talking about? Bowl haircut, hairy fingers?

Phoebe: How did your doctor's appointment go?
Rachel: Let's see, they gave me "cute boy" doctor today. In the middle of the exam, I put my pinkie in his dimple.

Monica: Why did you do that?
Phoebe: Remember my problem during my fourth month of pregnancy?
Monica: Oh, yeah. The Evander Holyfield phase. Man. You were so hard up, you practically came on to me.
Phoebe: You wish.
Monica: Hey, I could have had had you if I wanted you.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah? Come and get it.

Ross: Maybe I need some kind of a gesture. You know, something that says we're moving forward without having to talk about it.
Monica: Like asking her to move in with you?
Ross: Smaller than that.
Monica: Making her a mix tape?
Ross: Bigger than that.
Phoebe: Give her a key to your apartment.
Ross: Whoa, hello. We were closer with the mix tape.
Monica: Have you said, "I love you"? You could say "I love you".
Ross: I don't think I'm quite there yet. But I could say, "I love spending time with you."
Phoebe: We hate that.
Monica: That is a slap in the face.
Ross: Forget it. You know what? I'll just have the conversation. I'll just say I like things the way they are, and hope for the best.

Ross: What do you think, Rach?
Rachel: I think if it was a little colder in here I could see your nipples through that sweater.

Doug: What's going on, Bing? Does your wife have a problem with me or something?
Chandler: Well, now you're just talking crazy.
Doug: Then why can't we all go out together?
Chandler: Because we split up. Monica and I split up. Hold me.

Ross: Mona, I think it's time we had a conversation about where things are with us.
Mona: Yeah, I think I suggested that.

Phoebe: Oh, Ross, how'd the conversation go?
Ross: Oh, great. I live on the street.
Phoebe: Where?

Ross: Okay. I'm gonna need a bunch of extra keys. Apparently, I give them away for no reason at all.
Mona: Hey, Ross, what's going on? You're changing the lock?
Ross: No. That guy is.
Mona: I don't understand. You give me a key to your apartment, and then you change the lock?
Ross: Uh-
Locksmith: Good luck, buddy.

Chandler: You know what the worst part was? I got to see what my life would be like without you. You know, it was like "It's a Wonderful Life" with lap dances.