Rachel: Thank you for watching the baby.
Ross: Oh, it's fine. Actually, I invited Mike over.
Rachel: Phoebe's Mike?
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: I didn't know that you guys hung out.
Ross: We don't but thought it'd be nice to get to know him. Maybe have a little dinner, drinks, conversation.
Rachel: That's so cute. Ross and Mike's first date. Is that going to be awkward? What are you guys gonna talk about?
Ross: I don't know. But you know, we have a lot in common, you know? He plays piano. I played keyboards in college. He's been divorced. I have some experience in that area.

Joey: Hey, open the door! What's going on? What are you-?
Monica: Hi.
Joey: Why are you dressed like that?
Monica: Because, well, Chandler's gonna be home in a couple of days so I thought I would just, you know, practice the art of seduction.
Joey: But I thought I heard a man's voice before.
Monica: No, I was just doing Chandler's side of the conversation. You know, like, "Hi, how do I look?" "Really sexy. Could I be any more turned on?"

[phone rings]
Mike: I'll get it! Hello? Ross's place. Mike speaking. It's for you.
Ross: I don't understand what just happened here.

Phoebe: Hey, Mike, it's me. Listen, is Is Ross near you?
Mike: No, I just left.
Phoebe: Well, you have to go back in.
Mike: What? Go back? To the land where time stands still?

Ross: So Phoebe tells me you play piano.
Mike: Yeah.
Ross: You know, I used to play keyboards in college.
Mike: Oh. Do you have one here?
Ross: No.
Mike: Okay.
[long silence]
Ross: You know, I'm divorced. Phoebe- Phoebe says you're- You've been divorced?
Mike: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm sorry. I don't really like to talk about it.
Ross: That's okay. We'll talk about something else.
Mike: So you're a paleontologist, right?
Ross: Yeah.
Mike: My cousin's a paleontologist.
Ross: Well, he and I would probably have a lot to talk about.

Joey: All right, look. If you can't come home and deal with this, then I'm gonna.
Chandler: No!
Joey: I just heard him.
Chandler: Can you hear him now?
Joey: No. All right, I'm going in.
Chandler: No, wait!
Joey: I heard him again.

Rachel: We're not here to meet guys. You have a boyfriend. I have a baby and a Ross.

Chandler: All right, I've got a plan. I'll go down the fire escape-
Monica: Because all good plans start with, "I'll go down the fire escape."

Chandler: Hear me out, woman. I'll go down the fire escape and wait a while. Then when I come up the stairs, it'll be like I just got back from Tulsa. Then Joey and I will come in and see that there's no guy in here.
Monica: Aren't you afraid that Joey's gonna figure all this out? I heard it.

Phoebe: What were you thinking?
Rachel: I don't know. He was cute, and he liked me. It was an impulse.
Phoebe: But what about Ross? What about your moment? Don't you wanna talk to Ross about it?
Rachel: No. No, because I know exactly how the conversation's gonna go.
"Hey, Ross, you know, I think we had a moment before."
"Yeah. [ahem] Me too."
"Well, but I'm not sure I really want to do anything about it."
"Yeah. [ahem, ahem] Me neither. [ahem]"
"Well, should we just continue to live together and not really tell each other how we're really feeling?"
"Yeah, that works for me. [ahem, ahem]"
Phoebe: Yeah, I see what you mean. By the way, nice Ross imitation. But your Rachel wasn't whiny enough.
Rachel: What? Hey!
Phoebe: Better.