Janice: Ross, you left your scarf in- Hey, you guys. [laughs]

Janice: Actually, I should get going.
Ross: You're sure? I can stay out as late as you want. I told you I'm on sabbatical from work?
Janice: Yes, yes. You did.
Ross: Oh, man!
Janice: What is wrong now?
Ross: This isn't what I ordered. Man! Can't anything go right in my life? First, my marriage falls apart, and then-
Janice: I know. I know. And then you lose your apartment, then you lose your job, then your ex-wife gets married so fast. And now the coffee. Argh! Ross, we need to talk.
Ross: Okay. Sometimes I feel-
Janice: No, no. I'm going to talk. I believe that the sun has set on our day in the sun.
Ross: What?
Janice: You're a very sweet person, Ross. Unfortunately, I just don't think I can take another second of you whining.
Ross: Let me make sure I'm hearing this right. You're ending this with me because I'm too whiny? So you're saying I've become so whiny that l annoy you, Janice.
Janice: Well, yeah!
Ross: Oh, my God!
Janice: Are you going to be okay?
Ross: I am now.

Janice: Okay, I know what you all are thinking, but Chandler is in Yemen! I'm a young woman. I have needs. I can't wait forever.
Rachel: Yeah, no, that's what I was thinking.

Joey: Hi.
Janice: Oh, hi. Well, I guess that's two out of three, Joey! [laughs]

Ross: Dude, we got to talk. I just wanted to tell you something before you heard it from someone else. I hope this isn't too weird, but I had a thing with Janice.
[Chandler laughs]
Ross: You're not mad?
Chandler: Why would I be mad?
Ross: Because there's certain rules about this kind of stuff. You don't fool around with your friends' ex-girlfriends or possible girlfriends or girls they're related to.
Chandler: I am mad. But you know what I'm going to do, I'm going to forgive you. Because that's what friends do. They forgive their friends when they do everything you just said. All the things on the list, there.
Ross: Thank you.
Chandler: But I want you to remember that I forgave you.
Ross: Okay.
Chandler: I also want you to remember that I let you live here rent-free.
Ross: All right.
Chandler: And I want you to remember that I gave you twenty-seven dollars. No strings attached! Now, if you can't remember that I think we should write it down. Let's write it down!

Rachel: Come on, Joey.
Joey: Rach, I told you everything I knew last night. It's not that big a deal. So Monica and Chandler are doing it.
Rachel: I cannot believe you would say that.
Joey: Sorry. Monica and Chandler are "making love."

Ross: Hey, Gunther, could I have a scone? Want to hear some good news? Someone I know is getting married. Yeah, and weddings are happy occasions. Oh, and by the by, it's my ex-wife, Emily.
Chandler: Sorry, man.
Gunther: Here's your scone.
Ross: Oh, thanks, Gunther. [Ross smashes the scone on the coffee table] Stupid British snack food!

Monica: What was that?
Chandler: What?
Monica: That noise you just made?
Chandler: Oh, that was my work laugh.
Monica: Your work laugh?
Chandler: Oh, yeah. Believe me, if you're going to survive this party, you're going to have to come up with one too.

Chandler: Everybody at work loved you last night. And they like me more just because I was with you. I think you repaired a lot of the damage from when they met Joey.

Chandler: Anyway, I'm going to go try to find a racket.
Monica: I thought you already had one.
Chandler: Oh, I used to, but then Joey thought it'd be fun to go hit rocks at bigger rocks.