Frasier: Oh gosh, you know, maybe I have become stuffier. The highlight of my week was the arrival of my hand-tailored coat. Maybe it's time I loosened up a bit. Tried to tone down the whole fuddy-duddy image. [dials mobile] Hello, Donny, it's Frasier. Listen, I would really like to throw that bachelor party for you. No, no, I assure you I know what goes on at one. Yes, I'm quite, quite qualified. No, really, I promise you a night of such unrepentant debauchery that the mere memory will delight you in your old age. That is if you should survive the night.

Roz: Strippers, huh?
Frasier: You betcha. Acouple of real red hot mommas.
Roz: You don't even know where to find one, do you?
Frasier: Not a clue.

Frasier: Gosh, I'm off to one helluva start with the bachelor party. First, the debacle with Regan, now "Sid's Novelty Shop" is completely out of naughty coasters.
Martin: [perusing the smut rag] Oh, would you stop moping. It'll all work ass.

Daphne: Oh, Dr. Crane, I just want to tell you how happy I am you're throwing Donny's bachelor party.
Frasier: Oh, well, there you see? At least someone thinks I'm capable of throwing a...
Donny: ...nice low-key party just like my honey bunny insisted.
Daphne: Honestly. Why men have to celebrate getting married by having bouncing bosoms shoved in their faces. If I know Dr. Crane, your party'll be over by nine-thirty, we could all go out for dinner afterwards.
Donny: Oh, that- That'd be swell.

Frasier: Gosh, you know, if Daphne's so down on this whole bachelor party idea, maybe I should throw a more sedate one. I don't want to get Donny in trouble.
Martin: [perusing the smut rag] Listen, your job's to give him the party he wants. Everything else is between them. It's absolutely none of your boobs.
Frasier: [taking the magazine] Give me that! Stop that!

Dinah: I'm looking into a report of vandalism of a newspaper vending machine on Euclid Avenue. Does that sound familiar to you?
Frasier: Well, I may have been in the area earlier today, er...
Dinah: Somebody on the scene recognized you as the perpetrator. Are you away of the penalty for vandalism?
Martin: Uh-oh!
Frasier: Well, I may have dented the machine a little, but I...
Dinah: [pushes him back onto couch] Frasier Crane, you have the right to remain... aroused. Anything you see, can and will be rubbed against you.
Martin: She's a stripper!
Frasier: I get it, Dad.

Martin: I knew that Daphne was going to be gone most of the afternoon, so I figured I'd help you out. Boy, if you hire her for Donny's party, he'll put you in his will.

Mel: Don't tell me to calm down. It's a complete disaster. She'll ruin me.
Martin: What's going on?
Niles: Oh, it's Maris. She saw the picture of us today and she's determined to take it out on Mel.
Mel: Yes, she's telling everyone I caused her weight gain by nicking her thyroid during a neck tuck. I've already had three cancellations. She never thinks about anyone but herself! Daphne, get me a cup of tea.
Daphne: Actually, I have a bit of a headache.
Mel: Oh, you could be coming down with something. Wash your hands first.

Niles: Oh, you've got to calm down, your shoulders are so tense. Oh, you know, Daphne gives a wonderful massage, it might be just the thing for you.
Daphne: Actually, I was planning on taking a nap.
Mel: Oh, good, so you're not busy. Shall we do it in your room?
Niles: Look, you two run along. I'll take care of the tea. I really appreciate this, Daphne.
Daphne: You're welcome, Dr. Crane.

Frasier: If you keep the gun in it's holster until the very end, you see, that way your act has more... impact, shall we say? Bang, bang, bang, bang.
Dinah: Men seem to like my act the way it is.
Frasier: Oh, well, I certainly can't tell you about attracting men, but I do know a thing or two about showmanship. Tell me, what sort of encore do you have?
Dinah: I don't have an encore.
Frasier: Trust me, with this act we're going to need one. I have an idea...