Rochelle: I love you, baby. This is going to be the best anniversary ever.
Julius: I know.
[Julius punches a performer in a dog costume who sneaks up on him]
Julius: Hey, um, no, no, I-- No, hey-- He was-- He was-- He's okay.
Rochelle: I'm so embarrassed.

Tonya: Chris? Chris. Hmm.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] The idle sister is the Devil's workshop.

Rochelle: So, Chris, how did it go?
Chris: Great, fine, never been better, smooth as silk.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] With a bullet hole in it.

Tonya: So how was the play?
Rochelle: Well, we never saw it because we got kicked out because your dad knocked out one of the actors.
Tonya: You knocked out one of the dogs?
Julius: He snuck up on me.
Rochelle: You were in a theater, not an alley.

Drew: Hey, look at this. A guy got shot last night right down the street from where you guys saw the play.
Rochelle: Oh, too bad we didn't go see a movie. Maybe your dad could have knocked out the shooter.

Walter Dickerson: Hey, Chris. What happened at the movies Friday night? We couldn't make it, but I heard somebody got shot.
Chris: Somebody got shot?
Walter Dickerson: Yeah.
Chris: Oh, well, I wouldn't know, 'cause I didn't go.
Walter Dickerson: Hold up. You stood us up?
Chris: But you just said that you didn't go.
Walter Dickerson: It don't matter. If we invite you someplace, we expect you to show up. That's just rude, man.
Chris: Sorry.

Rochelle: Okay, Mr. Hurt Feelings, exactly what is it that you want me to do?
[fantasy: Rochelle walks in with three swim-wear models as Julius watches TV on the couch:]
Rochelle: Happy anniversary!
Julius: The Jet Beauties again?!
Rochelle: Have fun, baby. I'll see you tomorrow.
Julius: Oh, wow.
Model #1: Hi.
Rochelle: Now, you just had to push it, didn't you?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] My mother didn't even want my father's dreams to run off with a White woman.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] To get that cold, hard cash, I needed someone to take the heat.
Jerome: So, all I got to do is go into the police station, give a description of the guy, they give me a thousand dollars, and I could keep half?
Chris: Right.
Jerome: No, thanks. I ain't trying to be no snitch.
Chris: Oh, no, no, no. See, you're not snitching, I'm snitching. You're just collecting the snitch money.
Jerome: Hmm. Okay, I'll do it, but don't tell nobody.
Chris: What you think I am, a snitch?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Yes.

Jerome: Then I picked him out of a lineup.
Chris: You did what?!
Jerome: I picked him out of a lineup.
Chris: You never saw him. What if you picked the wrong guy?
Jerome: Hey, it happens to me all the time.
Police Officer: Hold it right there. You're under arrest.
Jerome: Wha-wha-what?
Police Officer: Falsifying a police report, obstruction of justice.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Back then police still cared about arresting the right person.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] At the barbershop, rumors about Jerome were spreading faster than Britney Spears for the paparazzi.
Risky: Cannot believe Jerome snitched.
Kill Moves: Ain't nothing they hate more in jail than a snitch.
Ryan: There's a few things they hate more, but let's say snitching's in the top five.
James: Man, I know a dude that committed suicide, didn't leave a note, 'cause he didn't want to be a snitch.
Chris: Is it really that bad in there?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Nah, prison is fun.
Chris: You guys don't think they'll kill him, do you? [others murmuring]
Kill Moves: [talking through a sock puppet] Don't look at me! I don't know nothing.