Adult Chris: [v.o.] I hate to admit it, but the first real breakup I ever had wasn't with a girl, it was with Greg.
Chris: Give me back Mercury.
Greg: Go ahead, you can have it. But I brought Earth into this project, so it's rightfully mine. Hey, where's my Earth?
Chris: It got burned up by the sun.
Greg: You know what? I'm gonna get another partner, then we're gonna finish this and slaughter you.
Chris: Yeah, well, I'm going to get one too.
Greg: Go ahead.
Chris: I will! Bye. Shoot.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] There's two more girls I can scratch off my list.

Greg: I still wish Earth was further away from the sun.
Chris: You think we can win it?
Greg: Are you kidding me? If we can't beat a bug in Jell-O, I'll go to school in your neighborhood.
Chris: You're right. This looks great.
Joey Caruso: [grabs their project] Hey, Frank. I finished our science project.
Greg: Hey, you can't do that!
Joey Caruso: What are you gonna do about it?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] All the science in the world is no match for a guy who could smack the taste out of your mouth.
[later, Caruso is crowned winner:]
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Caruso couldn't spell "solar system," but since he could kick both our asses, that meant the universe was his.
Joey Caruso: Yeah!
Greg: [to Chris] At least we beat the Jell-O bug.

Julius: You know what? Forget about it. It's no big deal. Money is money. We can still buy groceries with food stamps. You bought those name brands, so we gonna have to make it stretch, so get generic.
Rochelle: We ain't got the food stamps. [cutlery clattering]
Julius: What?
Rochelle: Oh, I gave it to my hairdresser to fix my perm.
Julius: That was $200 worth of food stamps.
Rochelle: Baby, she only gave me 25 cents on the dollar. What do you want me to do?
Julius: You couldn't talk her up to 27 cent? You know what? Hey, at least you paid the light bill. [the lights go off]
Rochelle: Chris!
Chris: I didn't do anything.
Rochelle: I know. I know.

Chris: Hey, Greg. You want to do a project together?
Greg: I don't know. I had a couple ideas I was already working on.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I wanted to work with Greg because my last science project didn't go so well.
[flashback to Julius and Rochelle jumping out bed and wriggling around:]
Rochelle: Chris! Would you get these damn ants out of here!
Adult Chris: [v.o.] James Brown stole that whole "ants in my pants" idea from my father.

Chris: Come on, man who else will partner with me?
Greg: Chris, it's not that I don't want to be your partner. It's just... I take my science very seriously.
Chris: Yeah, but, you know, we could still have fun.
Greg: We're talking about science, Chris, so you got to decide, do you want to have fun, or you want to win?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Hell, I just wanted to pass.

Greg: We can diagram the continental shift and show how mountain ranges form and show how the shape of the Earth has changed throughout history.
Chris: So I guess making a robot out of soup cans ain't gonna get it.
Greg: No.

Cashier: That'll be $95.33.
Rochelle: This store is highway robbery.
Sheila: Rochelle! Girl!
Both: Hey! [Rochelle drops her food stamps on the ground]
Sheila: What are you doing here? I didn't know you shopped here.
Rochelle: I come here all the time.
Tonya: Mama, you dropped your- [Rochelle kicks Tonya] Ow!

Adult Chris: [v.o.] Meanwhile, I turned down Greg's project on the Theory of Relativity.
Chris: Go!
[After Chris and Greg drop a feather and brick from the fire escape, the sound of glass shattering is heard]
Chris: Ooh!
Man: [o.s.] I'm coming up there, boys!
Greg: Go.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] He turned down my project on how to make ice. Finally, we decided on something we both liked:
Chris & Greg: The solar system!

Julius: Rochelle, I thought I asked you not to buy these name brands.
Rochelle: Oh, well, honey, I figured the kids...
Julius: You know what? Forget it. I forgot you used food stamps.
Rochelle: Uh-huh. We used food stamps.
Tonya: Mama, you know we-
Rochelle: Tonya, why don't you go get your daddy some syrup.
Tonya: For his cereal?
Rochelle: For his pancakes. Baby, you want some pancakes?

Julius: You know what? Instead of spending all that money on ourselves, why don't you, me and the kids go to the movies on Friday?
Rochelle: Well, isn't that expensive?
Julius: We got it. It could be fun. We could go see Rocky III at the dollar show. The kids love Rocky.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Usually, my mother would jump at going to the movies, because with three kids, she never had time. As a matter of fact, here's the last movie she saw.
[opening credits of "Super Fly"]
Rochelle: Movies are on TV every Friday, you know? There's no gum on the floor, no rats running through the aisles.You can get up and go to the bathroom as much as you like. As a matter of fact, Friday night, The Ghost and Mr. Chicken is on. Why would I need to go to the movies?
Julius: Because you're always complaining about how I never take you to the movies.
Rochelle: Well, I'm tired, you know? I just want to stay home.
Julius: Okay.