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Everybody Hates Ex-Cons

‘Everybody Hates Ex-Cons’

Season 3, Episode 17 -  Aired April 13, 2008

The robber Chris put away, Malvo, is released from prison and wants Chris's help. Meanwhile, Julius and Drew don't support the same baseball team, and Tonya has a friend who keeps getting into trouble.

Quote from Rochelle

Rochelle: Now, how would I know?
Alyson: Well, I called Latrinda from work. She says Tonya's coming over. I get to the house, nobody's there, so, obviously, Tonya dragged her off to God knows where.
Rochelle: So you're telling me that Latrinda's gone off someplace and you think Tonya has something to do with it?
Alyson: Uh, yeah.
Rochelle: Tonya?
Tonya: Yes, Mama?
Rochelle: Do you have any idea where Latrinda is?
Tonya: No.
Rochelle: Don't lie to me.
Tonya: She's at Black Paul's house.
Rochelle: Black Paul?!
Alyson: Black Paul?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Oh, Lordy, not Black Paul!
Tonya: She asked me to go with her and I said I couldn't come.
Rochelle: Does this answer your question?
Alyson: Yeah, thank you. Oh, um, excuse me. Does, um... Does Tonya know where, exactly, Black Paul lives?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Next door to Brown Willy's house.

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Quote from Julius

Drew: Yes! I win again! And that's two in a row...
Julius: Double or nothing.
Drew: Double or nothing? On two dollars?
Julius: That's right. Double or nothing.
Drew: Got yourself a bet. [they shake hands] Ow! Ow!

Quote from Adult Chris

Adult Chris: [v.o.] It was do-or-die for Malvo. Either he was gonna pass his test or the world would have one less astronaut.

Quote from Drew

Drew: It's a sad day, isn't it? I mean, it's got to be hard when you realize that your team is second-best. The team you loved your whole life since you were a little boy.
Julius: Here's you four dollars. Don't talk to me. [bumps into Drew]
Drew: Ow.

Quote from Chris

Chris: Hey, Malvo, how's it going?
Malvo: Pretty good, pretty good. I made a decision and I wanted to tell you about it first.
Chris: About high school?
Malvo: Yeah. I'm not going.
Chris: What?! What are you talking about?
Malvo: Getting into high school is harder that getting into jail. You got to obey all these rules, you got to fill out forms, you got to stand in line to get licenses for things.
Chris: What was all this about then? Why'd you put me through all this?
Malvo: Well, I thought my life would be better if I wasn't in trouble, and it is better... but I'm bored, Chris. I mean, when we were studying and working on stuff together, it was exciting. But to tell you the truth, Chris, I'm okay at being right, but I'm an expert at being wrong.
Chris: Malvo, you can't do this to me, man. I mean, what about all my hard work?
Malvo: Yeah, I appreciate that. That's why I'm not robbing you anymore.
Chris: Thanks.
Malvo: I'm robbing the store. [pulls out a gun] Now give me all the money.

Quote from Chris

Chris: I-I don't mean to make you mad... or anything... but... hypothetically speaking, what would happen if I said no?
Malvo: Nothing. I'm trying to change. It's not like I'll beat you up or stab you or anything.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] That's how Ike proposed to Tina.
Chris: Oh. Well, then, in that case... my answer would have to be... no.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Run!

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