Mary: Dick, do you have a problem with this?
Dick: No, why should I? Sally's fulfilling her purpose as a woman.
Mary: Oh, please, Dick, not every woman feels her life is incomplete until she got a man.
Dick: Well, hasn't your life been better since you met me?
Mary: Yes. But we've taken the time to learn about each other.
Dick: And we've learned a lot.
Mary: We've been together over a year, we're not getting married.
Dick: Certainly not.
Mary: We've never even discussed it.
Dick: You never brought it up.
Mary: Well, neither have you.
Dick: We're talking about it now.
Mary: I have a phone call to make.
Dick: Me too.

August: Whoa, beautiful flowers.
Tommy: Oh, thanks, I arranged them.
August: Really? You did a great job.
Tommy: Ah-ah, don't touch. You don't want to over-bunch the vase. Each flower has to be allowed to have its own moment.
August: Oh, yeah, moment. Uh, my uncle Wally owns a flower shop in Florida. His roommate Jasper helps him run it.
Tommy: So, you think he'll pass it down to his kids?
August: No, I think the legacy stopped right there in South Beach.

Mary: Ooh! Those are beautiful!
Tommy: Oh thanks, I was tempted to use willow branches, but they seemed a bit stark.
Mary: You're very artistic.
August: Yeah, I'm sure that's the word.

Dick: She's all yours now. I bet you can't wait to sleep with her.
Michel: Pardon?
Dick: You know, the big night, la nuit grande.
Michel: No, no, no, professor Solomon, this is a legal arrangement only, I will not touch your sister.
Dick: No, you have to! She's dying to!
Michel: Are you positive?
Dick: Of course, it's like those sneakers ads say, "Just do her."
Michel: You are a very strange family but strange in a way I can accept, huh? Salut!

Mrs. Dubcek: Can I borrow a toothbrush? There is the most adorable man out there with the government. He's looking for aliens.
Harry: [screams] Thank you, Miss Dubcek. Now go out there and hypnotize him with your feminine wiles.
Mrs. Dubcek: It's never been a problem.

Michel: But I need to get married. They'll send me back. I'm an alien.
Sally: What?
Michel: I-- I'm an alien.
Sally: Wow, okay. See this is never gonna work because I'm an alien too.
Michel: What? Then- Then what is the point of this?
Sally: I don't know.
Michel: Then give me back my money.
Sally: Well, I can't, I spent it on the dress.

Mary: I'm sorry, Sally.
Sally: It's all right, you know. I got the cake, I got the dress, I got almost all the way to the altar.
Mary: But you didn't get married.
Sally: I know, but what the heck. Hey, as long as we're all dressed up, who wants to go bowling? Tommy, Harry, grab my train.
Dick: She made a beautiful bride.
Mary: She'll make a beautiful bowler.

Tommy: Some white irises, Gerber daisies and a sprig of eucalyptus for balance and scent.
Harry: Cool, what you doing?
Tommy: I'm making a centerpiece for the football team.
Harry: Really?
Tommy: Yeah, it'll go great on their training table. I can't wait to see their faces when they see this baby.
Harry: [sings] Ooh, it's fun to stay at the Y.M.C.A.