Dwight K. Schrute: Hey, Packer, I made you some hot chocolate.
Todd: Why?
Dwight K. Schrute: 'Cause I wanna let bygones be bygones. Show you I'm cool. You're the new guy. It's cold out. I made too much. I got this awesome hot chocolate recipe from my wife.
Jim: That's a lot of reasons!
Dwight K. Schrute: Drink it!
Todd: I think I'll pass. The only hot chocolate I'm into is Vivica A. Fox.

Andy: Pam, can I talk to you in private?
Pam: I don't know if there's really a private place in this office.
Andy: Well, they put a sign-up sheet on the conference room and I signed us up for three mods. A mod is five minutes. And it started two minutes ago.
Pam: [looking confused] You did that?
Andy: Can we talk about this in the meeting? Because we're a little late.

Andy: What you did out there, earlier, was totally un-cool.
Pam: Well, what was I supposed to do, huh, let you walk all over me?
Andy: You humiliated me in front of everybody!
Pam: Okay, well I didn't think about it like that. It's just, I can't do anything about it. I can't replace your computer unless that one breaks.
Andy: I mean, it's pretty broken already.
Pam: Yeah, well if it breaks all the way I can get you a new one.
Andy: Pretty sneaky, sis.

Ryan: Hey cats, we got a jazz session in mod six, nine, and twelve.

Todd: [to Hank] And a '76 that's good to boot, I like that.
Michael Scott: And you made Hank smile, that doesn't happen often. You're very charming. That is something you should take upstairs, and use on people that really matter.
Todd: Why?
Michael Scott: I don't know. Holly mentioned that there were some complaints. And that you had said some things about Kevin.
Todd: Holly said that?
Michael Scott: Yeah.
Todd: Holly? She was laughing hysterically that whole time!
Michael Scott: I guess you said something weird about your daughter?
Todd: She asked me, Michael. It would've been rude not to answer.
Michael Scott: You've been on the road a long time. And you've been an outdoor cat. And now you have to be an indoor cat, so you can't be peeing all over the walls.
Todd: Michael, can I open the kimono with you. I've been on the road too long. But, I wanna connect with my daughter. And it's not right to call her a bitch in front of strangers.
Michael Scott: No, it isn't.
Todd: You're right. I gotta watch my behavior.
Michael Scott: Yeah, a little bit.
Todd: Don't give up on me.
Michael Scott: I won't.

Michael Scott: Kevin, do you accept the apology?
Kelly: Don't do it, Kevin, that's the fake kind of apology.
Michael Scott: Okay, go back to the annex.
Kelly: This is textbook. It's so uncool. Ryan does this to me all the time. Like it's some offense to have feelings. Don't do it, Kevin.
Ryan: [muttering] Sometimes you over react.

Pam: So, listen, we have to really scuff this up.
Andy: No, no, no, no, no! We can say that the previous owner was a neat-freak. Or an elegant old lady and she just kept it around in case her grand-kids came to visit, but they died and they never came, I- I think I'm gonna make myself cry.
Pam: Andy, this is the deal we made.
Andy: That's probably good. That's enough.
Pam: We should break this hinge maybe.
Andy: Let's not go crazy.

Andy: Pam, how is this thing even any better than my old computer?
Pam: Come on, Andy. I mean you said you wanted a new computer and this is the best I could do!
Andy: Where'd you even find this thing, like, in the corner in the warehouse?
Pam: Yes, I found it on a shelf in the corner of the warehouse.
Andy: Alright. Well, thank you for my garbage computer.

Todd: You're looking at the new face of corporate. Gonna put the "ass", in Tallahassee!
Michael Scott: Yes, about that.
Todd: Well we gotta go out and celebrate, tonight!
Michael Scott: Well, I don't know if that's a good idea.
Todd: Do you have a ball and chain?
Michael Scott: No, nothing like that at all.
Todd: Listen, I'm gonna tell you something that none of these people have the stones to tell you. It's your girlfriend. She's uptight.
Michael Scott: Sorry?
Todd: I know this stuff can hurt, but I wish someone had said something to me about my ex-wife. All I'm saying is about a month or so, have you down to Florida, I'll introduce you to all the local [spanks the air] talent.
Michael Scott: ... Sounds great.
Todd: It's gonna be so good.
Michael Scott: That is. It's gonna be awesome. I think you're really going to enjoy it down there.

Michael Scott: Hi.
Holly: You must be Todd.
Todd: Whoa, I'm sorry, Michael. I thought we were meeting Holly today, not Jennifer Aniston!