Lefervre: That was messed up what you did.
Michael Scott: Yeah. Yeah. I know, I know, I know, I'm sorry.
Lefervre: Who does something like that? Who promises that to a bunch of kids and then just doesn't come through like that?
Michael Scott: What can I do?
Lefervre: You can pay for my college.
Michael Scott: I can give you an extra laptop battery. Not everyone took one. How about this? If you can find a way to pay for your college tuition, let me buy your books, okay?
Lefervre: They're expensive.
Michael Scott: Yeah, well, I owe you that at least, right?
Lefervre: It's about $1,000.
Michael Scott: Really? Wow. That's over $200 a year.
Lefervre: No, $1,000 each year.
Michael Scott: For- Okay. Okay. Here's what I'm gonna do. I'm going to write 4 checks for $1,000 each. I'm going to date them one year apart. Now, you are to use one check a year. And please call me before you cash the check? Cause I've got monies to move around.
Lefervre: Okay. Okay. Make it out to my mom, Rosa.
Michael Scott: That's a lot of zeroes.

Erin: [singing] Hey Mr. Scott, What you gonna do, What you gonna do make our dreams come true. Hey Mr. Scott, What you gonna do.
Michael Scott: Please stop. 15 lives. I destroyed 15 young lives today.
Erin: No.
Michael Scott: Yes.
Erin: No, there's financial aid. Uh, they could join the army or the navy.
Michael Scott: You're what, like, 12?
Erin: The principal told me that 90% of Scott's Tots are on track to graduate, and that's 35% higher than the rest of the school. So I think that if you hadn't made that promise, a lot of them would've dropped out. Which is something to think about, I think.

Michael Scott: I think you're doing a great job.
Erin: Really?
Michael Scott: What do you want from this job, provided the company doesn't go out of business?
Erin: Well, I've always wondered what it might be like to be an accountant.
Michael Scott: Really?
Erin: Yes, but I'm terrible at math so...
Michael Scott: You know, when I hired Kevin, he was actually applying for a job in the warehouse.
Erin: Seriously?
Michael Scott: Yeah. I just sort of had a feeling about him. I have a feeling about you too.
Michael and Erin: [singing] Hey Mr. Scott, What you gonna do, What you gonna do make our dreams come true. Hey Mr. Scott, What you gonna do, What you gonna do make our dreams come true.

Jim: Guys, listen. This was anonymous, all right? There is no way I could've given it to myself because I didn't even know who was on here. I just gave it to the employee with the highest overall score.
Angela: To my tally, you just won back your own parking spot, a vacation day, and a nice, tidy quarter of $1,000 from all of us.
Jim: Will everybody stop for a second, because obviously I'm not taking any of it. A mistake has been made and we'll figure it out. Second of all, there was no cash prize.
Angela: Yes!
Jim: Dwight?
Dwight K. Schrute: Yeah, you said "In an ideal world, there would be a cash prize." Isn't that what you said?
Jim: No, Dwight, I meant- Yes, in a perfect world, someone would get money. But-
Phyllis: Yeah, but in your perfect world, only you get money.

Michael Scott: What if I told you I had done the worst thing ever, would you still want to be my friend?
Jim: Did you murder someone?
Michael Scott: Worse than that.
Erin: Oh, my God.
Michael Scott: Lurk much? [Erin leaves] I miss Pam.
Jim: I think she's okay.
Michael Scott: Is that what we're going for now? "okay?" We used to go for "pretty good."

Andy: Jim's talking to Michael right now. They totally went for our idea!
Dwight K. Schrute: Yeah! Your idea.
[aside to camera:]
Dwight K. Schrute: My idea. I just need Andy to think it's his idea. So it won't get traced back to me. In approximately six hours, Jim will get a phone call from David Wallace. He will be fired.

Jim: Okay, if it's all the same to you, I'm just going to take away "Survival Skills" and "Self-defense."
Dwight K. Schrute: I'm going to run this by Toby and Accounting and have him assemble the data.
Jim: That's okay, I'll do it.

Dwight K. Schrute: Hey, so Jim thought it would be ideal if we all pitched in-
Kevin: Hey.
Dwight K. Schrute: So Jim thought it would be ideal if we all pitched in a 20 for this whole Employee of the Month thing.
Kevin: Jim said that?
Dwight K. Schrute: He thought you were doing an incredible job last month.
Kevin: Jim said that?
Dwight K. Schrute: You seem surprised.
Kevin: No, no, that makes total sense.

Jim: Look, there was a big mistake obviously, so I will fix it. Okay? [to Dwight] This was your idea anyway.
Andy: Correction. It was my idea.
Jim: Okay.
[aside to camera:]
Dwight K. Schrute: My idea!

Jim: [answering phone] This is Jim.
David: Jim, what the hell is happening there?
Jim: Hey, uh, David.
David: Yes.
Jim: So there was a little bit of a miscommunication here today. It's been a little wild, uh, but I am on it.
David: Just so I understand. You started Employee of the Month, give it to yourself, then people complain, so you give it to your wife?
Jim: No.
David: Am I missing something?
Jim: I really don't know how it happened, David.
[aside to camera:]
Dwight K. Schrute: I know how it happened.