Andy: Black goes on the red with the... If we... Positive... It being a motor drive, it's just probably down.
Kid: He seems bad at this.
Andy: You want to do this, Junior? I didn't think so. I'm sorry. Had kind of a long day at the mechanic store. [minor explosion] You got a leaky spark tube.
Woman: What?
Andy: So your car's totaled. You're just gonna want to get a refund on that. Or my guy could do it. He's great, but I can't do that for you. I work exclusively on motorcycles.

Mr. Grotti: Now, if you could just sign this letter of intent, I'll bring this back to my boss, and we can get this in motion.
Andy: [clears throat loudly]
Mr. Grotti: You okay, Pat?
Andy: Yeah, I was just thinking about how I had this car, 'cause... This Italian car. And I was driving it, and it kept telling me how much it needed oil. But I wouldn't give it any oil. And then, one day, it exploded. And it killed everyone. And that's what I'm afraid of.
Mr. Grotti: Aren't you a mechanic? Why wouldn't you put oil in the car?
Andy: It was before my tech- Technical training.

Michael Scott: Hey. Um. Question for you. I recently purchased some insurance that I can't afford, given my present salary. Is there anything accounting-wise I can do to sort of make it all go away?
Oscar: Accounting-wise, no. But phone-wise, just call up and cancel it.
Michael Scott: No. What about this cash for clunkers thing?
Oscar: Just- No. No.
Michael Scott: All right. It was a thought.

Dwight K. Schrute: We have let Michael down. And it's 85% your fault.
Andy: He's alive, so you're welcome.
Dwight K. Schrute: Not on the inside, he's not. Look at his life. Broke. Living in fear. No friends, dead end job.
Andy: You know, some of that existed before.
Dwight K. Schrute: Not the living in fear. That's new.
Andy: You're right. That is new.

Dwight K. Schrute: He's got to stand up to this mafia guy.
Andy: I don't see that happening.
Dwight K. Schrute: Me, neither. Not the way things are now. But what if Michael felt no fear toward the mafia guy?
Andy: Are you saying that we surgically remove the fear center from Michael's brain?
Dwight K. Schrute: What is wrong with you? I am talking about convincing Michael that the guy's not mafia.
Andy: That seems a little far-fetched.
Dwight K. Schrute: More far-fetched than a mobster walking into a paper company for a low-level shakedown? And that happened.

Michael Scott: So I looked him in the eye, and I said, "Not today, Grotti. Not today. And not tomorrow. And not the next day or the day after that. And you can tell all your friends that if I see them, then they are already dead." I said something like that.
Dwight K. Schrute: Very close.
Oscar: Just to be clear, he backed down an insurance agent from Mutual of Harrisburg.
Michael Scott: Erin, coffee. Not from the kitchen. Stop and Shop. If it's not Stop and Shop, I send it back. Large.
If it's a medium, I send it back. If it's an extra-large, I send it back.
Erin: How do you return coffee?
Michael Scott: Go. Any questions?

Andy: What are you thinking?
Dwight K. Schrute: I think you're right. Definitely looks suspicious. And his southern Italian heritage raises some flags.

Mr. Grotti: God forbid you should have a fire in the warehouse.
Michael Scott: Yeah, definitely. All that paper burning up.
Mr. Grotti: And the truck goes off the side of the road. There's injury.
Michael Scott: Uh-huh. I hear you. The truck.
Mr. Grotti: You will be hearing from me, Mr. Scott. I can be very, very persistent.
Michael Scott: Do your worst.
[After Mr. Grotti takes his coat and knocks over the coatstand]
Mr. Grotti: Would you look at that, people? What an unpredictable world we live in, huh?

Dwight K. Schrute: What happened in there?
Michael Scott: Nothing. Other than once again, I am just thankful that I am a paper salesman.
Dwight K. Schrute: Did he threaten you?
Michael Scott: No, Dwight. Not everything is a threat.
Andy: Mobsters are.
Michael Scott: There is no such thing as monsters.

Andy: He drives an SUV. I knew it.
Dwight K. Schrute: More trunk space. Or should I say corpse space?
Oscar: Guys, I drive an SUV. Does that mean I'm in the mob?
Dwight K. Schrute: No, not that by itself. But look at all the facts. He seems like a mobster.