Jim: 19 minutes and 48 seconds. What were we doing for 19 minutes and 48 seconds?
Dwight K. Schrute: None of your business.
Jim: So I guess I can assume that was personal.
Dwight K. Schrute: Fine.
Jim: So maybe you're not completely ethical after all.
Dwight K. Schrute: Yes. Maybe I'm not.

Michael Scott: Kendall, my main man.
Kendall: [on speaker phone] Listen, Holly, Michael, I just got the report that your branch submitted, and there's a lot of stuff about a relationship Meredith is having-
Holly: Yes, that came out during the ethics seminar.
Michael Scott: And let the record show that it was during the immunity part of the seminar.
Kendall: I'm not sure these circumstances warrant any action.
Holly: Oh, I think it's pretty clear it was unethical.
Kendall: what I can gather, it seems like a gray area. Look, to be honest, the company's getting a discount at a tough time in our balance sheet, I don't know that the right thing to do for the company is to turn our noses up at that.
Holly: Um, Kendall, I understand that the discount is good for the company, but I'm just not happy about the way we're getting it.
Kendall: I thought it was clear with you, Holly. Your task was to get signatures from the employees showing that they completed the training.
Holly: No, I understand-
Kendall: Cause every other branch has managed to get those. So if it's not something you can handle, then that's a different discussion.
Holly: No. No, I can do it.

Michael Scott: How do you tell somebody that you care about deeply, "I told you so"? Gently? With a rose? In a funny way, like it's a hilarious joke? Or do you just let it go because saying it would just make things worse? Probably the funny way.

Holly: Can I have everyone's attention? Excuse me! May I have everyone's attention, please? We need to finish the ethics seminar.
Andy: No way, lady.
Kevin: It's a trap.
Holly: Everyone, please, I just need your signatures to show corporate I gave you the training.
Meredith: Don't sign anything.
Michael Scott: Okay, everybody listen up. If you are not in that conference room in 2 minutes, I'm going to kill you.
Stanley: It's a quarter to 5:00, and I have started to gather my things.
Michael Scott: Get in there right now, or I'm gonna lose it!

Michael Scott: I just don't want my employees thinking that their jobs depend on performance. I mean, what sort of place is that to call home? And Meredith needs this job. This is her main source of money.
Holly: Well, that's very sweet, but we have to follow the protocol. Those are the rules.
Michael Scott: Okay, new idea. We don't report at all. We just punish her.
Holly: We punish her?
Michael Scott: Uh-huh. Tell her, she can't have sex for 6 months.
Holly: I don't think we could enforce that.
Michael Scott: I don't know. I saw this thing, like a belt with a key.
Holly: A chastity belt.
Michael Scott: Yeah, it's more of a underwear garment that has little spikes, like, made of I think sometimes they're made of metal. You know what I'm talking about. You unlock a little door that- Down- Where you- Where you put- Where you put the...

Michael Scott: I will be honest with you, that car ride did not go well. And that was not my fault. The only reason I am standing out here right now is because I don't want to take the elevator with her. And I am holding on to her leftovers. [throws the leftovers away]