Frankie: Okay, does anybody else have any big projects due tomorrow that I don't know about?
Axl: I'm building a house for the poor.
Mike: Start here.

Cliff: Hey, Axl, is your section braced?
Axl: Uh, yeah. I think I know what I'm doing. I've taken shop three times. I've built five partially functioning bird houses. Never heard any of the birds complaining.

Sue: Isn't this place amazing? Passports, marriage licenses, jury duty... it's like all of life in one building. You can do anything here.
Mike: Except sit down. Or park for free.
Sue: It's so cool.
Frankie: [v.o.] And it was cool... all day long. They went upstairs when they were at the wrong window, they went downstairs when they had the wrong form. And they went home when Sue forgot her birth certificate. Yep, it was definitely cool.

Brick: [whispers] I want you to help me, not Aunt Janet.
Frankie: [lowered voice] Oh, cry me a river. I'm going on 40 years of this crap.
Brick: [whispers] But she's so bossy. [loud voice] Bossy.
Frankie: Shh!

Sue: [to a man in the line] I'm changing my name. Yeah. I'm gonna be Sue Lily. "Sue" means "Lily" in French.
Woman: Next?
Sue: Wait a second. If "Sue" means "Lily," then "Sue Lily" is the same as "Sue Sue." Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no.
I-I need to change it. I-I need a pen. Where's the form? We need to go to the back of the line.
Mike: Not a chance. We're next. You take one step out of this line, and I'm changing my name and vanishing without a trace.
Sue: Okay. Okay. Yeah, uh, I can do this. Uh... Sue... Betsy. Sue... Mackenzie. Sue... Bench. Sue... Probation.
Woman: Next.
Sue: [high-pitched voice] Sue Next!
Woman: Let's see. Okay. You're changing your name from Sue Sue Heck. Sue Sue? [Sue nods] Wow, that's different. You know, I've been doing this job for 40 years, and I gotta tell you I've never seen a name as unusual as Sue Sue.
Sue: Really? Wait!
[As the woman goes to stamp the form, Sue places her hand down and ends up with an "Approved" stamp on the back of her hand]

Mike: Tough day at the do-whatever-you-want plant?
Axl: I don't wanna talk about it.
Mike: Okay, thanks.

Frankie: [v.o.] Finals. The time when students all over put aside distractions and focus their full attention on their studies... unless they're a mom.
Frankie: [hairdryer whirs] Brick, get a napkin.
Brick: Oh, that's okay. I don't need one.
Frankie: Well, you're-- you're dripping all over my book. Here. Give me that.

Mike: Frankie, where are my keys?
Frankie: How am I supposed to know where your keys are?
Sue: Mom, you have to find dad's keys. I have my driver's license test today, and I cannot handle any extra stress.
Frankie: [snaps fingers] Hey, get- Get out of there. They're not in my purse.
Mike: Well, you're always taking 'em.
Frankie: I didn't take your stupid... [keys jangle] Seriously, people, I have to study. Out, out, out, out.

Frankie: [v.o.] It's amazing how your kid can be completely unhelpful and horrible to you, but he goes over to someone else's house, and...
Axl: Hey, Mrs. Finch, let me do that for you.
Mrs. Finch: Oh, thanks, Axl, you're so thoughtful.
Axl: Oh, I just don't like sittin' around. When I'm home, I have to be helping. So, um, where was I? Oh, yeah. So I'm running down the hall... totally late for class. Well, of course, my shoe comes off, but that's the problem with velcro, right? Anyway, I'm just about to my classroom, but here comes Mr. Farrar with the tardy sweeps, so I reach into my pocket for my hall pass, but all I find is a giant hole.
Mr. Finch: Came up empty, did you?
Axl: Yeah. So at this point, I figure I got three options: take detention, duck into the girls' bathroom, or make a run for it.

Cliff: Uh, so listen, I, uh, I really just dropped by to return this to you, Kevin.
Mr. Finch: Oh.
Cliff: I found it really fascinating.
Mr. Finch: Yeah, well, I thought you might.
Cliff: It turns out the author is actually a Professor at Northwestern.
Cassidy: You know, Axl was in the middle of a really interesting story.
Mr. Finch: Oh, yeah. How did that, uh, turn out?
Axl: Oh. [clears throat] Well, turns out my hall pass had fallen down my pant leg into my shoe. So I got out of detention seven minutes early. Mm-hmm. Practically unheard of. [chuckles]