Sophia: So, when I pulled out my license to show her, everyone saw it was expired. It made me feel old, Dorothy. I want to learn again.
Dorothy: Oh, come on. Ma, you're 81 years old. Your eyesight is weaker. Your reflexes are slower.
Sophia: And who are you, Magic Johnson?

Sven: Cousin Rose?
Rose: Cousin Sven!
Rose: Oh! Oh, let me look at you. Boy have you grown!
Sven: We've never met.
Rose: But admit it, you have grown!

Dorothy: Uh, Rose, could you introduce Blanche and me.
Rose: Oh, of course. Dorothy, this is Blanche. Blanche, this is Dorothy. [laughing] We have jokes like that around here all the time.
Dorothy: It's like living in a house full of Howie Mandels.

Dorothy: Hey, what got you two up and out so early?
Rose: Oh, I wanted to show Sven as many of the sights as possible today.
Dorothy: Did you get a picture with him at that Mr. Whipple cutout at the A&P?

Rose: We just stopped to pick up breakfast before we started off on our big day.
Sven: Will you ladies join us?
Sophia: What are you making?
Sven: Flendahueven.
Sophia: What's that?
Sven: Oatmeal. It's usually served with a cracker made from yak intestine.
Dorothy: Of course! Yak snacks.

Blanche: Dorothy, could I borrow your white wind breaker? Floyd McCallan is taking me sailing today on his yacht.
Dorothy: Uh, Blanche...
Blanche: I guess he felt so guilty about canceling last night he wanted to do something extra special.
Dorothy: Uh, Blanche...
Blanche: I can just hardly wait.
Dorothy: Blanche...
Blanche: Dorothy, if you're about to tell me Floyd called and canceled, I don't want to hear it.
Dorothy: He called.
Blanche: Oh! This is the last straw! This is it! I don't care if Floyd does own the most successful pet neutering business in greater Miami. As of this minute, I am never speaking to that lowdown scuzzball ever again! [phone rings] He changed his mind!

Dorothy: Rose, what's wrong?
Rose: That was the center. I have to work today. Now who's gonna show Sven the sights?
Sophia: Forget it. The only sights we're seeing is the empty lot behind the mall.
Rose: I already showed him that.

Blanche: Okay, come on, Swin.
Rose: It's Sven.
Blanche: He's mine now, I can call him what I want to.

Sven: If you don't mind, Blanche, I'd like to pay for lunch.
Blanche: Oh, don't be silly, Swin.
Sven: I mean it. You gave me a great tour of the city today. I don't think we have that many women shoe stores in my whole country.

Blanche: Oh, my Lord! Look who just walked in.
Sven: Who?
Blanche: Floyd. Look at that young thing with him. Why, she's half his age!
Sven: She's half your age.
Blanche: Shut up and hold my hand.
Sven: What?
Blanche: Hold my hand. Now look deep into my eyes. Look like you want to kiss me. Okay, move your lips around. Now go like this.