Erica: You know, I thought a lot about what you said, and I decided that Penn is a great choice for me.
Beverly: Oh, it's happening. We're going to Penn!
Erica: I know! I'm so excited that I decided to get a head start on my essay for their application. Here it is.
Beverly: "I believe that the University of Pennsylvania "is the right school for me because of its torkulent history and diligord reputation." Oh, boy.

Beverly: Murray, I don't understand why you insist he plays. Adam, be careful on that ice. It's very slippery.
Murray: Why don't you just skate around with him all game and make sure he stays safe?
Beverly: I know you're joking, but I would do that if the situation presented itself.

Adam: Do you want to act in it?
Murray: Do I?
Adam: Awesome! Lie down on the bed, and whatever happens, don't move.
Murray: Lie down and don't move? What do you know, I've been an actor my whole life.

Erica: Don't stop. Keep going.
Beverly: Ah, I'd rather not.
Erica: Okay, Pops, would you mind?
Pops: "I feel that I could really benefit from being part of its cromtormulous student body and weepeggle faculty." Weepeggle? What the [beep]?

Erica: Keep reading.
Pops: "I would be bumgubbled to quarp a university that is so vernaciously proggle that even the most zeticent student could gobulate." Gobulate? Honest question when you wrote this, were you smoking a jazz cigarette?

Beverly: Oh, about that, I made up some new vocab cards for you to memorize. This should get you the extra points you need to get into Stanford.
Erica: Oh, thanks, Mom. "Scubulence, noun the process of removing scuba equipment from a boat." Weird word.
Beverly: Yeah, weird and real.

Erica: Oh, well, I've got news for you. California ain't far enough away. I'm going to Japan university. That's right. Good luck popping in on me there.
Beverly: Do you really think that'll stop me? I'll fly halfway around the planet just to see you every weekend if I have to.
Erica: Fine! Then I'll just colonize the moon and go to college there!
Beverly: Then I'll get on a rocket every weekend just so I can give you a hug.
Erica: You can't do that!
Beverly: Oh, I can. And I will bring you Tang and I'll iron your space suit and I'll take your alien roommates to Bennigans!
Erica: I hate that you love me so much!

Adam: Okay, here's the backstory. You're a space miner about to explore an alien vessel all by yourself.
Murray: By myself? An alien vessel? No, no, no, no. Let's just send in a dog or something.
Adam: A dog?
Murray: We'll give it a flashlight. Strap a camera on its back.
Adam: You're on a solo mission. There is no dog.
Murray: Only a moron would go on a ship by himself.
Adam: Well, you're going in there, so I guess you're a moron.
Pops: How are things going in here?
Adam: He's refusing to go on the alien ship.
Pops: Murray, just go in the damn ship.
Murray: Fine! I will go in the damn ship.
Adam: Good, 'cause now an alien attacks your face and implants an egg inside your belly.
Murray: Well, that's exactly the reason I didn't want to go in.

Pops: But maybe you should do something that Adam likes for a change.
Murray: But he likes space ships and dragons and video games. Did you know that the Mario brothers aren't even real? For three years, I thought they were the boys who lived across the street.

Beverly: But don't worry. I hired someone else. She'll be here momentarily.
Erica: What? What's happening?
Beverly: Surprise!
Erica: No!
Beverly: It's me! I'm your new tutor!
Erica: Stop doing what you're doing.