Will: Hey, what's up, babe? Are you rested?
Lisa: Yeah, I must have been tired.
Will: Uh-huh. You was talking in your sleep last night. You always dream about Shaka Zulu?
Lisa: Shut up, Will.

Carlton: I'm totally in your debt, Will.
Will: Pfft. Come on, you don't owe me nothing.
Carlton: Yes, I do. If you ever need anything, anything, it's yours.
Will: Well, uh... you could talk to Uncle Phil about, you know, sliding me into his will. Forty, 50 G's, you know?
Carlton: Actually, my father and I aren't seeing eye to eye right now. I feel like everything he's ever said to me was a lie.
Will: Come on, Carlton, that's a little hard, don't you think?
Carlton: I spend my life believing in law and order, following the rules. Then some maniac pulls a gun and all the rules change. Well, I'm sick of being a follower, sick of being a victim. I'm gonna start making some rules.

Will: What is that?
Carlton: It's a gun.
Will: Carlton, are you out of your mind, man? You're walking around carrying a gun? What do you think you're gonna do with that?
Carlton: It's for protection.
Will: Carlton. Carlton. Whoa, man. What, do you think it's that easy to just shoot somebody?
Carlton: I'll close my eyes. [knocks over tray table]
Will: I was gonna eat that, man.
Carlton: Everything's a damn joke to you.

Will: Hey, yo, man, why I gotta carry everything anyway?
Carlton: Simple, Will, some of us are born owls and some of us are born mules. Guess which one you are.
Will: Oh, yeah? Well, I must be one of them owl-killing mules, then.

Nicky: Mommy, why are you crying?
Vivian: Because Will is hurt, sweetheart.
Nicky: Why?
Vivian: I don't know why.
Ashley: Nicky, come on, let's not bother Mommy.
Vivian: Oh, he's not bothering me, honey.

Lisa: Carlton, do you wanna talk about it?
Carlton: He was aiming at me.

Philip: Well, I talked to the doctor.
Vy: Yes?
Philip: Will's in stable condition. Now, the bullet was very close to his spine, but they got it. They got it.
Vy: Thank God.
Philip: Now, there's a possibility there may be nerve damage. But let's just pray that there isn't. They're going to move him to a private room.
Vy: Can we see him?
Philip: Well, I made a deal, we can see him now, but we're gonna have to go home after.
Vivian: Why?
Philip: Well, apparently, we're driving the nursing staff crazy.

Will: Hey, Ashley, what are you doing all the way over there, girl?
Ashley: I'm scared to touch anything. I don't wanna pull anything out.
Will: Come on, girl, get over here and give me a hug. [Ashley hugs Will] Aagh!
Ashley: Oh, my gosh!
Will: Psych.

Lisa: How's that?
Will: Oh, baby, that's perfect.
Vy: Oh, I see there's a new pillow fluffer in town, huh?

Will: Oh, is Carlton gonna be cool?
Philip: Oh, yeah, he's fine. I'll talk to him when he gets home. You get some sleep.
Will: Pfft. I don't know if I can get any sleep the way that thing is here beeping.
Philip: Well, if it stops beeping, you're gonna sleep a lot longer than you planned.