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Fez Gets the Girl

‘Fez Gets the Girl’

Season 3, Episode 12 - Aired January 16, 2001

Fez falls for the new girl at school, Caroline (Allison Munn). When Donna wins two tickets to a Led Zeppelin concert, Eric is busy at work after being made employee of the month. Meanwhile, Laurie practices hair styling on Kitty.

Quote from Laurie

Laurie: You hate it, don't you?
Kitty: No, no. It's interesting. I mean, just... Just look at all this body. I must... I bet I'm... I'm like... I'm four inches taller. [chuckles]
Laurie: I never should've gotten into this. I'm not good at anything.
Kitty: No, no, no. I like it, Laurie.
Laurie: Really? [Kitty nods] Thanks, Mom. Now all you need is a cut.
Kitty: No, no. No, no. No. Length- Length is good. Length is good. [Laurie picks up a pair of scissors] Drop 'em.

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Quote from Red

Eric: Well, excuse me for trying to buy a coworker lunch.
Red: I am not your coworker. You're a high school kid with a part-time job. You're temporary.
Kitty: Uh-oh. You know what ends fights? Pudding. Just give me seven minutes.
Red: Eric, you gotta stop acting like a big shot. You're not the king of the world, you know.
Eric: I'm employee of the month. I don't have to take this.
Red: This is no good, Kitty.
Kitty: Well, what are you gonna do, Red? He's growing up.
Red: No, I mean your hair. [Red hugs Kitty as she sobs]

Quote from Donna

Caroline: I'm Caroline. I think we have Spanish together.
Donna: Oh, yeah. Hi.
Caroline: Hola. [sighs] Um, you know that foreign guy you're always hanging out with?
Donna: Fez?
Caroline: Mmm, yeah. Fez. Um, is- Is he- Does he-
Donna: Oh, my God. You like Fez?
Caroline: Oh, my God. Come on. I'll introduce you to him.
Donna: Oh, no, no, no. That's okay. I just wanted to... I gotta go use the baño. [o.s. thumping] Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Quote from Kelso

Jackie: Jerk.
Hyde: Wench.
Kelso: Tool.
Hyde: Dill-hole.
Jackie: Moron.
Kelso: Moron.
Jackie: I already said moron.
Kelso: Moron.

Quote from Laurie

Laurie: See? Your cuticles look better already. Proper nail care is one of the easiest things to overlook.
Red: Uh-huh. Real good.
Laurie: Oh, gosh, Daddy. I didn't know you were a bleeder.
Red: I'm not.
Laurie: Um, could you apply some pressure to this while I go get some paper towels?

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