Man: Hey, any way you guys could set aside one of those 60-inch flat-screens for me?
Mateo: Um, do you see this? It's called a line. So no, I can't.
Man: I'll give you 40 bucks.
Cheyenne: It wouldn't be fair.
Man: Each.
Cheyenne: Oh...

Glenn: Hey, Tate, how's it going?
Tate: It's going fantastic.
Glenn: Great.
Tate: Nobody gets their prescriptions filled on Black Friday, so I got all the time I want to work on my screenplay.
Glenn: Oh.
Tate: It's about a pharmacist, obviously, who invents a pill that allows you to use all of your brain.
Glenn: Oh, like Limitless.
Tate: Not like Limitless!
Glenn: All right.
Tate: Why do people keep saying it's like Limitless? It's inspired by Limitless.

Jonah: If I could just get everybody describing what Black Friday means to them, that would be gr... Hey, that's a new camera.

Man: Excuse me, do you have any more of these espresso makers in the back?
Cheyenne: I think so, yeah.
Man: Okay, could you get me one?
Cheyenne: It's all the way in the back.
Mateo: Yeah, a lot of people need stuff right now. How do we decide who to help first? Is it you? Is it them? You, them? You? [the man shakes Mateo's hand] Ew, no. I want a bribe.

Woman: Oh, I'm looking for a little girl. She has a big bow in her hair. She's carrying a Baby Fashion Girl.
Glenn: Okay, relax, we're gonna find her. The important thing to do, though, is stay calm. And see? There she is, doing fine. It's all good.
Woman: Thank God. Trevor, we got a Baby Fashion Girl! [girl cries] [Glenn pops another pill]

Amy: All right, we've lost half our staff. We are what's left. Sandra, you're off of go-backs. I need you to cross-check Housewares. Heather and Brett, you guys are on opposite puking cycles, right? So you can switch off. And, um, Myrtle, I'm gonna need you to start folding, like, 1,000 times faster.
Myrtle: You got it. Full steam ahead! [slowly folds sweater]

Jonah: Amy?
Amy: Jonah?
Jonah: Hey.
Amy: Yeah, the line in the ladies' room was really long, so...
Jonah: Got it. No, no, no. Please, uh, make your... self at home.
Amy: Thanks.
Jonah: Hey, uh, you know why they call it Black Friday?
Amy: We really don't have to make conversation.
Jonah: Okay, okay, cool.
Amy: We can just...
Jonah: Yep.
Amy: Be quiet.
Jonah: Okay. That's fine. Total silence.

Amy: I'm relieved, by the way, about not being pregnant.
Jonah: Oh.
Amy: You were asking earlier, so...
Jonah: Oh, oh, uh, good. Yeah, no, I... I don't blame you. That's... one child is... is enough.
Amy: I've always thought I wanted, like, two or three.
Jonah: Oh.
Amy: Yeah, I mean, I think maybe I still do, just not with... with, you know, everything that's going on in the world, and...
Jonah: Yeah, it's, uh... it's complicated times.
Amy: So complicated.

Jonah: I-I don't mean to rush you, but you see yourself being done anytime soon?
Amy: No, I'm waiting for you to be done.
Jonah: Well, that's unfortunate, because I was waiting for you, so...
Amy: [sighs] God.

Jonah: This is the dark night of our souls... a portrait of hopelessness. A...
[Brett takes Jonah's camera, throws it in the trash and then leaves]
Jonah: Wow, we've lost Brett.