Jerry: What are you doing here?
George: I knew you had an appointment.
Jerry: Well, this is very awkward.
George: I'll leave when the guy comes in. Hey, I got to tell you, I am loving this yada yada thing. You know, I can gloss over my whole life story. [picks up dental tool]
Jerry: Hey, you don't play with that. That's going in my mouth.
George: Hey, what this thing? Woo.
Jerry: All right, that's enough. Now get going. Get out of here.

Jerry: [answers phone]
Woman: Would you be interested in a subscription to the New York Times?
Jerry: Yes. [hangs up]

Kramer: I don't believe that.
Mickey: If you had gotten into the backseat of the car we could've figured this whole thing out.
Kramer: Why were you holding the door open for?
Mickey: Not for you! Who holds a door open for a man?
Kramer: Well, I thought it was a nice gesture. But I guess I was wrong!
Mickey: Let's just put they're names in a hat.
Kramer: I don't even know their names!

Kramer: Look, why don't you just take the one that was on the left?
Mickey: I'm not sure she was my type.
Kramer: Oh, everybody's your type.
Mickey: What the hell does that mean?
Kramer: You've been married three times.
Mickey: That's it, it's go time! [charges at Kramer]

Elaine: All right, look, I got an idea. Why don't you just show up early for your next date, sit across from each other, and see who the girls sit next to.
Mickey: That's not bad.
Kramer: All right. So we let the girls decide.
Mickey: Yeah, why should we knock ourselves out?
Kramer: Yeah, I wanna wear that shirt next time.
Mickey: No, no one wears the shirt next time.
Kramer: That's right, because they already saw it.
Mickey: We'll look like idiots. [they exit]

George: Well, we were engaged to be married, uh, we bought the wedding invitations, and, uh, yada, yada, yada, I'm still single.
Marcy: So what's she doing now?
George: Yada.
Marcy: Speaking of ex's, my old boyfriend came over late last night, and, yada, yada, yada, anyway. I'm really tired today.

Elaine: Beth, Arnie, hi. What's up?
Arnie: Well our adoption application was denied.
Elaine: Really?
Beth: The adoption agent seems to feel that Arnie has a violent temper.
Elaine: Oh.
Beth: So we're just asking our friends what they may have said to the adoption agent.
Elaine: Well, I... Uh, you know, I just told them what kind people you are, and how Arnie's a big movie buff, and, yada, yada, yada. That is it.

George: Well, it was a hell of a yada yada.
Marcy: He's moving to Seattle. He wanted to say goodbye. I was just getting out of the shower. And yada, yada, yada.
George: All right, enough! Enough! From now on, no more yada yada's. Just give me the full story.
Marcy: Okay. Well, when I got out of the shower, I was dripping wet.
George: Not that story. Another story.

George: Tell me about the free facial.
Marcy: Okay, well, like I said I was on Third Avenue, and I stopped by a large department store.
George: Which one?
Marcy: Bloomingdale's.
George: Very good. Go on.
Marcy: Oh, and I stole a Piaget watch.
George: What's that?
Marcy: And then, I was on such a... high, that I went upstairs to the salon on the fifth floor, and got a massage and a facial, and skipped out on the bill.
George: Shoplifting.
Marcy: Well, what about you? You told me that you were engaged. What was the rest of that?

[Jerry enters confessional and sits down on the kneeler. He taps on the wooden sliding door, which Father Curtis opens]
Father: You know, that's a kneeler.
Jerry: Oh. [switches to a kneeling position]
Father: Tell me your sins, my son.
Jerry: Well, I should tell you that I'm Jewish.
Father: Oh, that's no sin.
Jerry: Oh, good.