Elaine: Oh, hi Greg.
Greg: Haven't seen you in a while.
Elaine: Yeah. Well, actually, today was the first day I worked out since the Central Park Mini-Marathon.
Greg: You ran the Mini-Marathon?
Elaine: No, but I exercised that day. [laughs]
Greg: Well, I gotta take off.
Elaine: Yeah, I guess as an airline pilot, you're one of the few people who can say that and mean it. [laughs again to no response]

Meryl: Uh, would you, um... Can I...
Jerry: Pardon?
Meryl: The syrup. Would you pass the syrup?
Jerry: Oh, you want to try the syrup.
Waitress: Can I get you anything else?
Jerry: Um, yeah... I think my wife and I will have a little more coffee.
Waitress: Okay.
Meryl: And a check for my husband.
Jerry: [toasts with his orange juice] To my beautiful wife.
Meryl: To my adoring husband.
Jerry: Adoring? What about handsome?
Meryl: I like adoring.
Jerry: Yeah, sure, adoring's good for you, what does it do for me?

Owner: Uh, excuse me, where did you get that?
Jerry: I, uh... Well...
Owner: Uh, we don't allow any outside syrups, jams or condiments in the restaurant. And if I catch you in here with that again, I will confiscate it.
Jerry: Well, I told my wife not to bring it.

Kramer: Really? 25% off? Do I get that, too?
Jerry: No, just Meryl.
Kramer: Why, why? Why does she get it?
Jerry: Because she's my wife!

Elaine: All right, listen to this. Remember that guy I was telling you about at the health club?
Jerry: The fly-boy.
Elaine: Yeah.
Jerry: Hey, where's George? I thought he was with you.
Elaine: I waited, he didn't show up. Anyway, this guy gave me an open-lip kiss.
Jerry: So?
Elaine: So? We've always just kind've pecked. This one had a totally different dynamic.
Jerry: Really.
Elaine: Yeah. I mean, his upper lip landed flush on my upper lip. But his lower lip landed well below my rim.
Jerry: Moisture?
Elaine: Yeah. Definite moisture.
Jerry: That's an open-lip kiss, all right.
Elaine: Yeah. Listen, I think he's giving me a big signal. I mean, maybe he wants to change our relationship.

[As Elaine goes to answer Jerry's buzzer:]
George: [over intercom] Oh, uh...it's George.
Elaine: Hey, what happened to you?
George: [meekly] Nothing... little problem.
Elaine: Well, what was it? I mean, I was waiting.
George: Can I come upstairs, please?

Jerry: Hello.
Meryl: Oh, hi, honey.
Jerry: What are you doing here?
Meryl: I just thought I'd drop off a few things.
Jerry: Oh. Well, I must have been in the incinerator room when you left. Here you go, Marty. [hands over Kramer's quilt]
Marty: Another quilt? Huh?

Greg: I'm glad you're here. This can get really boring. Do you know where I can get some good olives?
Elaine: I can find out.
Greg: Would you?
Elaine: Sure. [inner monologue] Ooh, a project. That's a definite signal.
Greg: By the way, you look really great in that leotard.
Elaine: Oh, thanks. [inner monologue] That's no signal, who wouldn't like me in this leotard? I look amazing in this leotard.
Greg: Hey, you know what's weird? I think I had a dream about you last night.
Elaine: [inner monologue] Okay, he open-lips me, he dreams about me, we have an olive project, that's it. I'm asking this guy out. [out loud] Um, you know Greg, I...
Greg: Can I have a sip of your water?
Elaine: Oh, yeah, sure. [hands him her bottle]
Greg: Thanks. [before Greg takes a sip, he wipes the bottle cap on his shirt]
Elaine: [inner monologue] Oh, my God.

Jerry: Honey, what'd you do with the can opener?
Meryl: I didn't do anything with it.
Jerry: Well, it's not here, it was here yesterday.
Meryl: It's in the first drawer.
Jerry: I'm looking in the first drawer. It's not here.
Meryl: Yes, it is.
Jerry: Hey, I'm not stupid. I'm looking in that drawer. There's no can opener.
Meryl: Did I say you were stupid?
Jerry: Well, wouldn't I have to be? You tell me there's a can opener in the drawer, I'm looking in the drawer, there's no can opener, what other conclusion could one reach? [phone rings]
Meryl: Do you want me to go find it?
Jerry: Yes. I do. You show me where there's a can opener in that drawer. [answers the phone] Hello! I'm sorry, I'm just fighting with my wife.

Helen Seinfeld: [on the phone] Is she there? Can we talk to her? What's her name?
Jerry: Mom, I'm not married.
Helen Seinfeld: What?
Jerry: I'm not married!
Morty Seinfeld: I knew it. I told you!
Helen Seinfeld: Uncle Leo said.
Jerry: I'm just pretending I'm married to get a discount on dry-cleaning.
Helen Seinfeld: A discount on dry-cleaning?