Pensky: Gee, George, I'm sorry I gave you the wrong impression. What I was going to say was, "Now, you are aware that our Board of Directors has been indicted, myself included, and we're prohibited from doing business until the investigation is completed. So obviously, we would have no use for you."
George: Obviously. [buzzer]
Pensky: [answers intercom] Yes.
Secretary: [over intercom] Excuse me, but Mr. Costanza's car is being towed.

Mr. Tuttle: Well George we here at Sanalac like to think of ourselves as a fairly progressive company. We have a small but prestigious group of clients.
George: Well, a lot of people consider me small and prestigious. [chuckles]
Mr. Tuttle: That's funny, George. You're very quick. I feel like I don't- I don't have to explain every little thing to you. You understand everything immediately.
George: I enjoy understanding.
Mr. Tuttle: I want you to have this job. Of course...
Secretary: [enters] Mr. Zimmer is on line 2.
Mr. Tuttle: Great. Thanks. [to George] I've got to take this call. Listen, I'm really glad that you came in.

Kramer: What are you all dressed up for?
George: I had a job interview.
Kramer: Yeah. How'd it go?
George: Good. Of course...

George: He massacred you!
Jerry: I know.
George: You look like you're five years old.
Jerry: What if I shampoo? Sometimes a shampoo helps.
George: You've got to start seeing someone else. Get out of this relationship.
Jerry: I can't. He loves me. He says I'm his most loyal customer. Plus, he's right there on the corner. I'd have to pass him every day when I go by.
George: You gotta do it.
Jerry: I can't, I can't. I'd break his heart.

Kramer: No way my Gino did that. It's an Enzo.
Jerry: He was in the shop. I thought you told he he wasn't gonna be there.
Kramer: So what?
Jerry: I didn't want to hurt his feelings.
Kramer: His feelings? You can't continue seeing him.
Jerry: Yeah, but...
Kramer: Aah! You're destroying yourself. I'm not going to let you. Now, if you don't call him I will.
Jerry: No, Kramer. I don't want you to do that. You can't do that.
Kramer: I'm going to call Gino, you're going to see him, and we're going to get that haircut fixed up.
Jerry: I don't want you to call him.
Kramer: All right, geez. You're crazy.

Jerry: Well, I can tell you this, you can forget about me going to that bachelor auction.
Elaine: What? No, Jerry, you have to go.
George: You know Elaine, I'd do it but I'm working that day.
Elaine: [flatly] Yeah, too bad.

Kramer: This is the worst haircut Jerry's ever had. You gotta fix it.
Gino: Sure, I fix it. But you gotta make sure you no tell anybody. He's a little crazy. I don't know what he'd do if he found out I touch Jerry's hair. [Enzo enters] So I love the Edward Scissorhands. That's the best movie I've ever seen.
Enzo: Oh. Again with the Edward Scissorhands. How can you have hand like scissors, huh? Show me one person who's got hand like scissors.
Gino: Hey, it's a beautiful dream. I'd love to be this man.
Enzo: Did you ever think about what you're going to do on the toilet? [shouts] What are you going to do on the toilet?
Kramer: I'd like to have shoehorn hands.

Gino: Boy, you've got a beautiful head of hair.
Jerry: Thank you.
Gino: I bet Uncle Enzo, he tell you that all the time.
Jerry: Well, actually Enzo hasn't said that to me in a while.
Gino: I don't think Uncle Enzo realize what a lucky barber he is.
Jerry: That's nice of you to say.

Gino: Uncle Enzo, what are you doing here?
Enzo: I've come to apologize.
Gino: Apologize?
Enzo: Yes. I rented the move Edward Scissorhands. That Johnny Depp, he make me cry.
Gino: He make me cry too. You want something to drink?
Enzo: Hey, what's all of this?
Gino: Nothing. It's just hair.
Enzo: You do haircut in the apartment?
Gino: No. Pizza man was here. Maybe some fall off. He's going bald.
Enzo: It looks very familiar.

Jerry: In the one minute that he worked on me, I could tell he was really good.
Kramer: Yeah. Slow, gentle, attentive.
Jerry: Yeah. Yeah.
Kramer: I told you he could do it.
Jerry: But Enzo picked up one of my hairs off the floor.
Kramer: Yeah, so?
Jerry: I think he knew.
Kramer: No. He doesn't know.
Jerry: How do you know? He knows my hair.
Kramer: Listen, you're just imagining things. He doesn't know a thing. Now come on. Pull yourself together.