Lucy: [v.o.] Anyway, my friend Ben will propel our group to the top of the class. I'm so moved, I want to put those feelings into words.
Lucy: Dr. Turk, I can't wait to slice up this old bastard's ticker.
Lucy: [v.o.] Perfect.

Cole: Talkin' pregnancy sex? Yep, nothing like a girl with a little junk in the front.
Dr. Cox: What are you, some kind of pervy ninja?
Cole: Oh, thanks, man. Appreesh.

Cole: You know, I haven't bagged a preggers yet, but I bet it's like having sex with a water bed.
Drew: The baby bump actually has the tension of an exercise ball. I was a doula in Madrid for two years.
J.D.: Oh, Drew, so cool. Been to Europe.

Cole: Hey, just babymoon it, dude, all right? But don't- Don't play any jazz while you're having sex, 'cause I read on the web that it will make the baby gay.
Dr. Cox: Jazz makes babies gay, ladies and gentlemen. Jazz makes babies gay! Future doctor.

Lucy: You know, drew, we haven't really connected yet.
Drew: Nope.
Lucy: Is that because by sleeping with Cole, I've invalidated myself as a person?
Drew: Pretty much.
Lucy: I get that.

Drew: So you ready for the big heart dissection tomorrow?
Lucy: Totally. Plus my dad sent a care package of smoked meats from home, so I thought afterwards maybe you, me and Cole could go to the park and have a sausage picnic. Okay, that sounded weird.

Drew: I was just gonna say that you haven't done any cutting of our cadaver yet.
Lucy: I know. I'm psyched to get in there.
Cole: Hells, yeah. My woman's gonna go all Edward scissor hands on his ass. [imitates cutting noises] I'll make it a hedge.
Drew: Is he, like, really good in bed or something?
Lucy: He'd have to be, right?
Drew: I'd hope so for your sake.

Turk: What are you doing here? Were- Were you talking to your cadaver?
Lucy: Uh, yeah. I thought I heard that you were supposed to talk to it. Like a plant, so that it will, you know, grow. What are you doing here?
Turk: Oh! I saw the light on, 'cause, you know, I was over in my office working. 'cause I work at night, you know.
J.D.: [over walkie-talkie] I counted to 50. Ready or not, here I come.
Turk: [whispers] You didn't see me, all right? I wasn't here.

Drew: Lucy, you screwed us. We're being graded as a team.
Lucy: Ben's not just a grade to me. He's a person.
Cole: Hey, this is bigger than you or him. This is about a jet ski, yo!
Drew: Cole, silence or punching. You know our deal.

Drew: Lucy, you have got to cut.
Cole: The jet ski is the motorcycle of the sea! [Drew punches him] Ow!
Drew: Pain is how we learn.