Stevie: Well, I'd love to say I had a choice in the matter, but according to David, driving his fiancé to go get his wisdom teeth out is totally within my maid-of honour responsibilities.
David: Okay, tell me how I'm being unreasonable? Also, if this is what it takes to get you out of that dank little apartment...

David: Okay. Honestly, Stevie, what other job is better than owning your own business?
Stevie: I guess I just feel like after making such a big deal out of... wanting to see what else is out there, isn't it kind of... pathetic to like... crawl back? Don't answer that. I already turned down another job interview today.
Patrick: Maybe you just needed to see what you didn't want in order to figure out what you do? Look at me. Two years ago, I thought I'd have a wife and kid at this point.
David: [snorts] Yeah, well, one out of two isn't bad. I've been told I'm... very young at heart. [to Stevie] Can you drive better, please?

Moira: Hi.
Jocelyn: Uh-oh! Hello, Access Hollywood? Have I got a star sighting for you! [giggles]
Moira: Very pawky, Jocelyn.
Jocelyn: I just heard the big news. A movie premiere in our own backyard! I might have to buy a dress!
Moira: Uh... save yourselves the trip to Frocks4Less. From what I've heard, it's more of a minor league viewing party.

David: Okay, here we go.
Patrick: That was a fun car ride.
David: Yes, it was very fun. Thank you so much for all the hot tips you were giving our Uber driver. For a second, I was concerned about my rating, but I think he seemed to enjoy all the wrong directions you were yelling at him.
Patrick: David, I'm hungry. I'm a hungry, hungry hippo
David: 'Kay, we're not supposed to feed you right now.

Stevie: How are things at the motel?
Johnny: Good. We bought the second motel! First phase of many in the Rosebud Motel expansion. Big things on the horizon, Stevie, which is, uh, why I wanted to sit down with you today. But not on your bed.
Stevie: Oh, here.
Johnny: Right.

Alexis: Okay, so I may have a problem.
Moira: Oh, it's barely noticeable, dear. We'll find you an electrologist.

Alexis: Okay, we have a situation on our hands that needs to be solved now. We have a 12-time Daytime Emmy Award-attending actress coming to walk a Merlot carpet in hours, and press coming from all over, bringing attention to your town. So either you can help me out or I pull the plug now and nobody wins.
Ronnie: Fine. But you owe me a prime spot on that carpet.
Alexis: Wait, you wanna walk the carpet?
Ronnie: Honey, it's a movie premiere, is it not?
Alexis: Ugh.
Roland: And I assume the mayor is walking the carpet as well, yes?
Alexis: Yes... if he has to. Okay, I will schedule your arrival time when I get home.
Ronnie: I would like to request a time before Roland.
Roland: And I'd like to go first.
Alexis: Mm-'Kay.

Roland: All right, I better get back and put my skinny jeans into the dryer. I think they're really gonna pop on your 20-foot Merlot.
Alexis: I think so too! They're gonna pop on that carpet.

Stevie: No, it's not Larry Air. So chapter one of your book is all about trusting your instincts, and I haven't been doing that.
Johnny: Oh, well, that's okay, Stevie. I mean, learning to trust your instincts is something that comes with age and experience.
Stevie: No. I'm talking about trusting your instincts. I think I've been taking them for granted.
Johnny: So, you read my book?
Stevie: Most of the first chapter. I didn't sleep well last night, so I kind of dozed off.
Johnny: Well, the first chapter is more of an introduction, right? Setting the table.
Stevie: 'Kay, but what I've realized is that you've given me the opportunity to take this job and run with it. So, if you really think you can make something out of franchising this motel, I think I want to be part of it.
Johnny: You think?
Stevie: I wanna be part of it. I want back in.

Patrick: Where did all these people come from?
David: Why are your pupils so dilated.
Patrick: No, yours are.
David: No, yours are. [gasps] Why are you dressed like a limo driver?
Stevie: Your mother insisted. Why are you both glassy eyed?
David: What?
Stevie: Wow!