Sheriff Butterfield: Mr. Disher. I've been telling you all week you gotta fix your fence, you got deer all over the road. You must be the famous Mr. Monk. Disher talks about you all the time.
Deputy Hatcher: You gonna clean his house while you're here?
Sheriff Butterfield: He's joking. We were jokin' with you. Welcome to Chambers County, Mr. Monk. Got a housewarming gift for you. It's the case file, complete with photos. But you're both wasting your time. It was a suicide, sure as shootin'.
Adrian Monk: How do you know?
Sheriff Butterfield: Lenny and me were the first ones up here. We were at the community center down the hill. There's a big dance every month. Someone heard a gunshot. We were here four, maybe five minutes later.
Adrian Monk: You didn't see anybody else?
Sheriff Butterfield: Nah, he was alone. I'm 100% sure. The irrigation sprinklers were on, the ground was muddy, there were no footprints, by the truck, on the road, nowhere. It was suicide. Sad but true.
Deputy Hatcher: Sheriff, we have to go.
Sheriff Butterfield: [to Monk] I'm gonna need that back. There's another dance tonight. You can bring it with ya.
Lieutenant Disher: Well, I wasn't planning on going to the dance tonight.
Sheriff Butterfield: I wasn't talkin' to you. [to Disher] Do something about those deer.
Lieutenant Disher: Yes, ma'am.
Adrian Monk: Did she wink at me? I think she winked at me.

Lieutenant Disher: There's no footprints. Monk, I'm sorry. Guess I brought you out here for nothing.
Adrian Monk: Maybe not. Maybe not. She said that somebody at the dance heard the gunshot. Check out who it was.
Lieutenant Disher: Jimmy Belmont.
Adrian Monk: Yeah. How far away is that dance hall?
Lieutenant Disher: I don't know. Half a mile?
Adrian Monk: You really think somebody could hear a gunshot from that far away? Especially if there was dancing and music playing?
Lieutenant Disher: I don't know, but we can find out.

Woman: Lemonade!
Adrian Monk: Okay.
Woman: I made it myself.
Adrian Monk: Oh, then no, thank you.

Adrian Monk: Were you here last month?
Woman: I sure was. I haven't missed a dance in 12 years.
Adrian Monk: Great. Did you hear the gunshot? From the Disher Farm?
Woman: No, sir. I sure didn't.
Adrian Monk: Did you hear the gunshot last month from the Disher Farm?
Man: Well, I can't say as I did, because I didn't.

Sheriff Butterfield: Mr. Monk, I was hoping you were gonna be here. I'm going undercover tonight. What do you think? Oh, is this your first square dance?
Adrian Monk: I'm not here to dance. Randy and I have a theory about the case.
Sheriff Butterfield: Well, I have a theory too. I think you really came here to dance. Come on!
Adrian Monk: No, no, I can't! I'm- I'm married.
Sheriff Butterfield: Where's your wife?
Adrian Monk: She's dead.
Sheriff Butterfield: To be honest, I've got mixed feelings about that. On the one hand, I'm sorry for your loss. On the other hand, here we go!
Sheriff Butterfield: Loosen up. What are you afraid of?
Adrian Monk: Well, it's a pretty long list.

Adrian Monk: Is Jimmy Belmont here?
Sheriff Butterfield: Why?
Adrian Monk: Just curious.
Sheriff Butterfield: He never comes to these things.
Adrian Monk: Wasn't he here a month ago?
Sheriff Butterfield: You're right, he was.
Adrian Monk: Did anybody else besides Belmont hear the shot?
Sheriff Butterfield: No. That is pretty odd, now that you mention it.

Lieutenant Disher: I still can't believe I forgot to load the gun. I tried yelling. Did you hear anything?
Adrian Monk: No.
Lieutenant Disher: I was standing in the middle of the road yelling bang for 20 minutes. I'm just glad the captain wasn't there.
Adrian Monk: These things happen.
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, to me. They happen to me, Monk.

Adrian Monk: Okay, look, our little demonstration didn't work. But you might be right about Jimmy Belmont. That night a month ago was the first dance he had been to in ten years. And he was the only person there who heard the gunshot. It's pretty suspicious.
Lieutenant Disher: Suspicion isn't proof.
Adrian Monk: You know, I'd still like to meet him, talk to him.
Oates: Well, it won't be easy. Belmont never leaves his farm, and he don't like visitors. But he is looking for a new farmhand.
Adrian Monk: No, no, I can't. I- I- Randy, you know, I just can't.
Lieutenant Disher: It's fine, Monk. I don't blame you. Forget it. Just-- Forget about me. Look at us. Losers all. Hey, at least I don't have any kids. It ends with me.

Jimmy Belmont: Senor Monk. ¿Tienes una ardilla en tus pantalones, sí?
Adrian Monk: Si.
Jimmy Belmont: Si?
Adrian Monk: Si.
Jimmy Belmont: I just asked, "Have you got a squirrel in your pants?"
Adrian Monk: Um... Uno ardilla...
Jimmy Belmont: You don't speak any Spanish, do you?
Adrian Monk: Some. High school.

Adrian Monk: You've been supplementing your income. What do you have, about four or five acres of marijuana back there? Harvey Disher found it. And he was threatening to turn you in. [Jimmy cocks his gun] You killed him.
Jimmy Belmont: Did I? How? See, Harvey Disher's truck went off the road at 10:30 pm. That's a fact. Hit the electric fence. Everybody saw the lights go out. I was in the dance hall, half a mile away, in front of 50 witnesses. Now, you think you got enough for a search warrant? Yeah, I don't either. Not in this county. It's time you were headed home, former Detective Adrian Monk. Front gate's that way. Go on ahead. Go on.