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‘Mr. Monk and the Blackout’ Quotes

Monk: Mr. Monk and the Blackout

303. Mr. Monk and the Blackout

Aired July 9, 2004

Monk investigates an explosion at a power station that knocked out the lights across the city.

Quote from Lieutenant Disher

Captain Stottlemeyer: What do you got, Randy?
Lieutenant Disher: Winston Brenner. He was an activist in the '90s. He was indicted in a series of bombings in Boston. Pretty angry individual. Here, look at this. This is the letter from the power plant. This one is from 11 years ago. He uses a lot of the same phrases. "The blood I shed today," "the blood I shed today." "Price of absolute freedom," "price of absolute freedom." Check this out. The handwriting is identical. This is definitely the guy. The only thing is, is that back then, Brenner didn't really care about the environment. Anti-military was his thing.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Did you read the rest of the file, Randy?
Lieutenant Disher: We've got some pictures, too. They're blurry but good.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Read the rest of the file, Randy.
Lieutenant Disher: Which part?
Captain Stottlemeyer: The part here where it says that he died. Deceased 1995. He blew himself up before the trial.
Lieutenant Disher: He's dead.

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Quote from Adrian Monk

Sharona: I'm going to hell. I'm a horrible person.
Adrian Monk: Why?
Sharona: I just told that woman Michelle that there was nothing wrong with you.
Adrian Monk: She should have asked me.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Captain Stottlemeyer: [over bullhorn] Mr. Drake. My name is Leland Stottlemeyer. I'm with the San Francisco police.
Adrian Monk: He is filthy. I need some wipes.
Captain Stottlemeyer: I've got a copy of a document here. I'd like you to take a look at it. I'm sending it up.
Alby Drake: What is it?
Captain Stottlemeyer: There was a bombing at a power plant on Monday night.
Alby Drake: Yeah. I saw the lights go out. It was a beautiful thing, man. The stars were awesome!
Captain Stottlemeyer: We need you to look at that document and tell me if you recognize the handwriting.
Alby Drake: Why should I?
Captain Stottlemeyer: We believe that your friend Winston Brenner is still alive.
Adrian Monk: [takes bullhorn] Mr. Drake, we are also sending up some wipes.
Alby Drake: What for?
Adrian Monk: To clean yourself. They're pre-moistened. They have a million and one uses.
Alby Drake: Go to hell!

Quote from Adrian Monk

Adrian Monk: There's this woman. She works at the power plant. She, um, she said that she thought I was interesting. She, she gave me her number. I, I told you it was funny.
Dr. Kroger: Is she nice? Adrian? Is she attractive?
Adrian Monk: Are those new shoes?
Dr. Kroger: No, no, Adrian, don't change the subject. Not today. I would like to talk about this woman. Is she attractive?
Adrian Monk: I don't know. How am I supposed to know if a woman is attractive?
Dr. Kroger: By looking at her. Adrian, there's a reason why you mentioned this, and I think you should give her a call. It's been eight years, Adrian. Maybe it's time for you to take a tiny little baby step forward. Adrian, I'm your doctor, and I'm writing you a prescription.
Adrian Monk: I can't read your writing.
Dr. Kroger: It's upside-down. It says "call her". You don't have to go out with her. You don't even have to meet her. Just give her a call. What's the worst that could happen?
Adrian Monk: I... I might not hate it.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Michelle Rivas: Are you Adrian Monk?
Adrian Monk: Yes.
Michelle Rivas: Wow, I can't believe I'm meeting you. I'm a huge fan of yours.
Adrian Monk: I think you're mistaking me for anybody else.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Michelle Rivas: I was just reading about you. I was just reading about how you recovered that stolen Picasso.
Adrian Monk: Oh.
Michelle Rivas: You're a genius. I'm Michelle Rivas, resident P.R. flack and hardhat adjuster.
[After Michelle shakes Monk's hand, Sharona gives him a wipe]
Michelle Rivas: Are you afraid of cooties?
Adrian Monk: Yes. Among other things.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Captain Stottlemeyer: [over bullhorn] Mr. Drake, this isn't a game. During that blackout, three people died.
Alby Drake: They died?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Yes, sir, they did. There were two heart attacks and one young woman on a dialysis machine, which makes this a homicide investigation. Do you understand me?
Adrian Monk: [takes bullhorn] It's me again. You know Ralph Nader uses the wipes. He loves them. And, uh and Fidel Castro. All the radicals love the pre-moistened wipes. Sting, he uses them all the time.
Sharona: Sting?
Adrian Monk: He's a rock 'n' roller.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Adrian Monk: Hi. It, it's me. Adrian Monk.
Michelle Rivas: Right on time, Mr. Punctuality.
Adrian Monk: Actually, that used to be my nickname, Mr. Punctuality.
Michelle Rivas: In college?
Adrian Monk: Kindergarten.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Sharona: It's that new game, Doodle Fever.
Adrian Monk: Oh, good, I love games.
Benjy: Okay, I'm going to draw something. You have to guess what I'm drawing in two minutes.
Adrian Monk: Why don't you just tell me what it is? Then we don't have to play.
Sharona: Well, that wouldn't be very fun, now, would it? We're supposed to be having fun, right?

Quote from Adrian Monk

Sharona: Ooh, wait, it's 9:00. The show's about to start.
Adrian Monk: Thank God.
Benjy: What are we watching?
Sharona: That concert for the San Francisco bicentennial. It's with Willie Nelson.
Benjy: Hey, remember when you guys saved his life?
Sharona: Yes. And he gave Adrian one of his own harmonicas.
Benjy: Can I see it?
Adrian Monk: Oh, no. I, I had to throw it out. Mr. Nelson put his, you know, mouth on it.

Quote from Lieutenant Disher

Lieutenant Disher: Captain. Monk was right. And you were right, too, sir, about Monk being right. Good work.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Sharona: I am so proud of you. I... Are you going to see her?
Adrian Monk: I don't know what happened. She said, "Do you want to get together?" And I panicked. I, I lost my head. I said "Okay."
Sharona: So you have a date.
Adrian Monk: I have a date.
Sharona: Aren't you excited?
Adrian Monk: Yes, I am if by excited you mean petrified and full of regret.
Sharona: Petrified and full of regret. Welcome to the world of dating.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Adrian Monk: I cannot find my night-vision goggles. There is a fatal flaw in the night-vision goggle plan. [glass shatters]
Sharona: Adrian, he's breaking in.
Adrian Monk: I hear him. Where's my broom?
Sharona: Oh, God, will you forget the broom?
Adrian Monk: But the broken glass.


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