Lieutenant Disher: Captain. Monk was right. And you were right, too, sir, about Monk being right. Good work.

Sharona: I am so proud of you. I... Are you going to see her?
Adrian Monk: I don't know what happened. She said, "Do you want to get together?" And I panicked. I, I lost my head. I said "Okay."
Sharona: So you have a date.
Adrian Monk: I have a date.
Sharona: Aren't you excited?
Adrian Monk: Yes, I am if by excited you mean petrified and full of regret.
Sharona: Petrified and full of regret. Welcome to the world of dating.

Adrian Monk: I cannot find my night-vision goggles. There is a fatal flaw in the night-vision goggle plan. [glass shatters]
Sharona: Adrian, he's breaking in.
Adrian Monk: I hear him. Where's my broom?
Sharona: Oh, God, will you forget the broom?
Adrian Monk: But the broken glass.

Sharona: Go. [Benjy draws]
Adrian Monk: It's a line. It's a slightly crooked line. It's, um... It's a line that should be straighter. Two lines. They're not parallel. They're uneven lines. They're uneven... Two uneven lines. Uh... Asymmetrical. It's an asymmetrical shape. A disturbing asymmetrical shape. Am I close?
Benjy: No.

Sharona: Time's up;
Benjy: It's a houseboat.
Adrian Monk: Oh, yeah, yeah, I can see that now. Oh, I can see the wave.
Benjy: That's a shark.
Adrian Monk: Oh, yeah. That should have been a clue. Well, that was fun.

Sharona: You know that nine months after every blackout, the birth rate goes up?
Benjy: Nine months? Oh. I get it.

Sharona: Adrian, please don't worry, all right? The lights are going to come on soon, I'm telling you. Now I'm going to go in the kitchen, fill the sink up with water, and look for another candle.
Adrian Monk: When will it be over?
Sharona: I just told you, it won't be long.
Adrian Monk: When will it be over?
Sharona: Adrian, they're working on it.
Adrian Monk: When will it be over?
Sharona: Will you stop asking me that? I don't know.
Adrian Monk: When will it be over?
Sharona: I don't know.
Adrian Monk: When will it be over?
Benjy: Make him stop!
Sharona: God, Adrian, for the love of God, please, come on! [the lights come on] You see? Now, was that so bad?
Adrian Monk: I didn't know when it would be over.
Sharona: So I heard.
Adrian Monk: [chuckles] I didn't know when it would be over.

Captain Stottlemeyer: Miss Rivas. You're saying that there was no security here at all, no camera, no guard? Michelle Rivas: The cameras were all on the outside. There are none here in the main yard.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Well, if the bomber knew that, then this is probably an inside job.
Michelle Rivas: We're assuming it was, or at least he knew what he was doing. You see, when this station went down, the next one on the grid tried to compensate, then the one after that, causing a full reactive power surge. 3.2 seconds later, the entire sector went dark. Actually, we got lucky. The bomb went off at exactly 9:00.
would have been on the primary grid, and we would have lost half of California.
Adrian Monk: Doesn't make sense. He knew where to set the bomb, but not when to set the bomb.
Captain Stottlemeyer: He screwed up.
Adrian Monk: Maybe. Or maybe he was being selective. Maybe he didn't want to black out the whole state.

Lieutenant Disher: Captain. Feds found a note, uh, more like a manifesto.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Well, how are the Feds treating us?
Lieutenant Disher: So far it's a love fest. They're sharing everything.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Well, let's check it out before they sober up.

Michelle Rivas: The article said that you were single.
Adrian Monk: I was married. She died.
Michelle Rivas: Wow. And you still wear the ring. I like that. That kind of devotion you don't see that much anymore.
Adrian Monk: No, you sure don't.