Hal Quote #374
Quote from Hal in Malcolm Holds His Tongue
Hal: Sorry to interrupt, Wheeler, but I thought we could have a little race.
Wheeler: Apparently, this man's a lot like you girls you all can't get enough of looking at my backside. [laughter] This shouldn't take long.
Hal: Oh, and just one more thing. This time, just to be different, let's... walk.
Wheeler: What are you talking about?
Hal: You thought no one would discover Yyour dirty little secret, didn't you? That clever little flail of the wrist every four steps, masking the hop. [crowd gasps] But you can't fool the tape. The tape sees all, and I see the tape. You are not a racewalker at all. You're nothing but a common jogger. [crowd gasps]
Wheeler: That is so rid- [walks off with the tape]
Hal: Don't worry. He won't get far.
Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Malcolm Holds His Tongue’ Quotes
Quote from Stevie
Malcolm: What the hell is wrong with me?! Why can't I just learn to shut up?
Stevie: We're... the same. We speak... before... we think.
Quote from Malcolm
Lois: A peptic ulcer? How did you manage to get a peptic ulcer? The doctor said you have the stomach lining of a 60-year-old air traffic controller. You are a teenager, for God's sake. What do you have to be stressed about?!
Malcolm: For your information, I just spent the past three hours on a gurney next to a guy who is still trying to smoke out of the hole in his neck. And the jackass who put in this I.V. couldn't find a vein with two hands and a flashlight! My call button doesn't work! These stupid sheets are itchy. There's only one channel on the TV. And what's this about a bedpan?!
Quote from Hal
Hal: "...and everyone but the rabbit lived happily ever after." And the moral of that fable, son, is that turtles are pathological liars who won't give you their gold.
Dewey: Got it.
[Hal is mesmerized as he sees a power walking team pass through the park]
Dewey: Dad?
Hal: It's like watching the gods return to Olympus.