Lorelai: [on the phone] The engagement is off, Sookie.
Sookie: What? What happened?
Lorelai: Well, it's a long story. I don't really want to go into all the whats and whys and gory details right now but, um, you should know we all still love Max. And to figure out what happened you'd have to dig up Freud himself and have him work on me full-time.

Rory: A cool B & B?
Lorelai: Yes.
Rory: That's like saying 'an understated Nicolas Cage movie.'
Lorelai: Listen, I myself am not usually a fan of B & B, but Donald's place is different.
Rory: Captain Corelli's Mandolin.
Lorelai: I'm serious.
Rory: [Italian accent] "Bella bambina at two o'clock!"

Woman: What are the titles?
Lorelai: Well, there's, um, Goodnight Spoon and The Horse That Wanted To Bark.
Woman: Oh, I think I've read that to my grandson. The horse learns to bark, and then he... What happens at the end?
Lorelai: He dies.
Rory: But he learned to bark, though, so it's actually an upper.

Lorelai: Wow. Harvard is over 300 years old.
Rory: Founded in 1636.
Lorelai: That means almost everyone who ever went to Harvard is dead now. You sure you still wanna go here?
Rory: Yes, I'm sure.
Lorelai: They developed the pacemaker here. Also discovered how electromagnetism and radioactivity are two manifestations of the same force and postulated existence of a charmed quark. I was wondering who did that.
Rory: The smarties at Harvard.
Lorelai: Holy smokes. They get an average of 18,000 applicants every year, and only 2,000 get in. Those are not good odds.
Rory: Mom.
Lorelai: No, no, you're different.

Lorelai: Hey, there's people looking for roommates, tons of them. "Wanted: Girl to share a two-bedroom apartment on Trowbridge. Quiet street, quiet building, so quiet roomie a must." Join a convent and cloister yourself, you loser.
Rory: Mom, it's gonna be two years before I go to Harvard. These people will have roommates or have graduated by then.
Lorelai: Who says these are for you?
Rory: Who are they for?
Lorelai: Me. If you're gonna be in a dorm, I'd need a room nearby so I can come visit.
Rory: How often are you gonna visit?
Lorelai: I don't know. Every other day. Too much? What's too much?

Rory: That's an interesting point, but I'm not sure I agree with you. That's because Stoicism was not about giving up things of money and luxuries and stuff.
Professor: That's right. By the time he was in his early 40s Seneca had earned enough money to acquire villas, farms. He ate well. He loved expensive furniture. But he didn't consider that a non-philosophical way to live.
Rory: It's all kind of relative, though.
Male Student: Here we go.
Rory: What?
Male Student: We can't get through a class without debating relativism.
Rory: I just meant that luxury to some is not necessarily luxury to others.
Professor: A better subject for another time.
Rory: Oh, sorry.
Professor: No, your point is well-taken, but it's different than what's at hand. What we're talking about is Seneca's choosing the better more comfortable of two options while remaining a Stoic.
Rory: [to the male student] Thanks, this was fun. [exits]

Emily: Why on a world do you insist on taking slides?
Lorelai: I like slides.
Emily: But prints are so much easier and faster to get through.
Lorelai: That's what I hate about prints. You give people this big pile of pictures that you're so proud of. And they flipping through them super fast without really seeing them or giving you a chance to narrate them, like you can with slides.
Rory: I stopped her from adding music.
Emily: I'm eternally grateful.
Lorelai: I like the bigness of slides, too. Makes you feel like you're really there.
Emily: yes, this one makes me feel just like I'm in your finger.

Lorelai: Iced tea spoons, right?
Emily: Lorelai.
Emily: Because nobody really needs iced tea spoons ever. I mean, you would probably use them if you remembered but nobody does. They're never with the everyday silverware. Out of sight, out of mind. So people just grab a regular everyday spoon to stir. And you know what? They work fine.
Emily: It wasn't iced tea spoons.
Lorelai: Oh, oh, oh. Corn-on-the-cob holder thingies? Sterling silver corn-on-the-cob holders?
Emily: No.
Lorelai: Ha!
Emily: What?
Lorelai: The tiny forks.
Emily: What tiny forks?
Lorelai: The ones with tiny prongs and handles, that I can only assume are used to eat tiny food?
Emily: They're for lobster tails.
Lorelai: So you did get the tiny forks.

Lane: Oh, did you ever think this day would come?
Rory: I had hopes, dreams.
Lane: I escaped from Korea. I'm home. Hi, Lorelai.
Lorelai: Welcome home, sweetie.
Lane: It's so amazing to be back. When I got off the plane, I kissed the tarmac.
Rory: Just like the Pope.
Lane: It was hot, I burned my lips.
Rory: Maybe that's why the Pope always looks grumpy.

Lane: Did you get my letters?
Rory: Yeah, the first one was a little intense.
Lane: Which one was that?
Rory: The one that said: "Korea equals death", with a bunch of exclamation points and your very sad face cut out plastered all over it.
Lane: Okay, that was a tad dramatic.