Lorelai: Hi, Dad. What are you doing? I thought you were gonna tour the town.
Richard: Oh, I did. I did. I went into all the stores. The cat one, twice. And then I walked around a little, and then I was done.
Lorelai: What about the park? See the park?
Richard: Yes, I saw the park.
Lorelai: What about the giant slinky over on Klump? We're mighty proud of that.
Richard: I saw the slinky, yes, and the 100-year-old oak tree and the life-size yarn person. I even stopped by your house and had Babette introduce me to all her gnomes. And then I realized the only thing I had not seen is my daughter at work.

Richard: Is your jacket in the back?
Lorelai: My jacket?
Richard: Your work jacket.
Lorelai: I don't have a work jacket.
Richard: That's your working outfit?
Lorelai: Yeah.
Richard: And your boss doesn't mind?
Lorelai: Oh, well, considering my boss is me, no, she doesn't. I mean, she did at first, but then I bought her a cup of coffee, I realized all the hostility she was expressing toward me was just jealousy. We've been best friends ever since. Just take a seat, Dad. [to Michel] Will you get me an extra bottle of champagne and smack me over the head with it?
Michel: Absolutely.

Rory: What are you doing?
Paris: Trying just to blend in, fade away, observe.
Luke: Hey, Rory, coffee?
Rory: Thanks, Luke.
Luke: Who's your friend?
Rory: Angela Lansbury.

Richard: And that's how you handle a business call?
Lorelai: I've known Manny for 10 years, Dad.
Richard: I don't care how long you've known him. You never talk to a business associate like that, especially not one that you employ.
Lorelai: Okay, Dad.
Richard: These people have to respect you.
Lorelai: He does respect me.
Richard: You were flirting with him.
Lorelai: I said what I needed to say in order to get the linen before somebody else did... and I did, so I won.
Richard: This is not about winning. This is about proper procedure. You need to listen to me, Lorelai. If there is one thing I know about, it is the correct way to conduct yourself in a position of authority. Do you understand what I'm trying to tell you?
Lorelai: Mm-hmm.
Richard: Because I'm only telling you this for your own good.

Paris: Nothing. Not even a cigarette butt on the ground. I can't believe it. This town would make Frank Capra want to throw up.

Rory: What are you doing?
Paris: This is it.
Rory: What?
Paris: Our story. Censorship in a small town. It's perfect.
Rory: Paris, stop it, you know I don't believe in censorship.
Paris: Even better. "Small-town minds run amok". This is genius. It's gold. We're going to win.

Rory: Grandpa, do you like Chinese food?
Richard: If prepared properly, yes, I like it very much.
Rory: I'll go call Al's.
Richard: Al's?
Rory: Al's Pancake World.
Richard: I thought you said we were having Chinese food.
Lorelai: Al's has the best Egg Foo Young in Stars Hollow.
Richard: Is that saying, um, anything?

Lorelai: Rory, come entertain your grandpa while your spirited mommy orders, please.
Rory: Grandpa, do you want to see my room?
Richard: Yes, I would.
Lorelai: $20 if you lock him in there.
Rory: $30 if you chill.

Richard: Ah, Harvard.
Rory: Yeah. We started the obsession board a few years ago. When we took that trip to Harvard the student store was having a two-for-one flag sale so that sent us into the final stage of the psychosis. Hospitals were called, medications were prescribed. There is no cure.

Lorelai: Okay, I made the menu for the evening.
Richard: My God.
Rory: Looks good.
Richard: Who could eat all that food?
Lorelai: I almost added the garlic chicken.
Rory: Add it.
Richard: But there are only three of us.
Lorelai: Yes, but we like choices.
Rory: Let's call. I'm starved.