Previous Episode Next Episode 

‘The One with the Screamer’ Quotes

Friends: The One with the Screamer

322. The One with the Screamer

Aired April 24, 1997

Ross tries to convince Rachel that her date is an aggressive bully, but everybody thinks he's just jealous. Meanwhile, Phoebe spends days on hold with the phone company, and Joey is hurt when Kate gets a job in Los Angeles.

Quote from Phoebe

Joey: Hey, Pheebs, where were you?
Phoebe: I'm so, so sorry. I am definitely gonna see your play. I swear, your play is very important to us. Thank you for your patience. Your play is the next play I'm gonna see.

Rate

Quote from Phoebe

Rachel: Phoebe, are you still on hold? I was supposed to call my dad back two hours ago.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah. He clicked on. Call him as soon as you get a chance. He's at Flimbees.
Rachel: What's Flimbees?
Phoebe: That's the word I use when I can't remember the real thing.

Quote from Chandler

Joey: Ross, how about you?
Ross: Yeah, I also need two.
Monica: Really? Who's number two?
Chandler: "Whose Number Two?" One of the more difficult games sewer workers play.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: I'm setting the phone down. But I'm still here. Just don't go anywhere. I'm still here.
Don't switch or anything, because I'm right here. Just one sec. One sec. One second! Wait! One second! Just...
Monica: What?
Phoebe: Monica, I'm scared!
Monica: Honey, that's a sleeve. Also, we have speakerphone.

Quote from Ross

Ross: Well, this is awkward.
Tommy: Yeah?
Ross: Well, you know, because Rachel and I used to go out.
Tommy: Oh, I didn't know that.
Ross: Oh. Well, then this is awkward.

Quote from Chandler

Ross: I'm telling you, this guy Rachel is with is crazy. He viciously screamed at total strangers. I think he's bad news.
Chandler: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You don't like the guy Rachel's dating? Well, that's odd.

Quote from Estelle

Estelle: Oh, you two girls were outstanding. Do they have representation?
Joey: They weren't in the play.
Rachel: We're not actors.
Estelle: What a shame. Because with her face and her chest, I could really put something together.
Chandler: Could I borrow it?

Quote from Joey

Kate: You really think these newspapers are just jealous of me?
Joey: Absolutely. You're talented and you're good-looking.
Kate: You're sweet and cute.
Joey: I know. That's why they trashed me.

Quote from Phoebe

Monica: Pheebs, you've been up for 24 hours. Go to sleep. Honey, this isn't healthy.
Phoebe: No, no, I'm fine. And you know why? Because of all the riboflavin.

Quote from Monica

Monica: Joey, you had "the night"!
Joey: What?
Monica: When two people finally realize their feelings for each other and they talk for hours and learn all about the other person.
Joey: You think?
Monica: Did you, like, learn about her family?
Joey: Two brothers. One died.
Monica: Yes!

Quote from Chandler

Ross: Look, I wasn't gonna say anything to you, but... All right, I don't think you should be seeing Tommy anymore.
Rachel: You don't?
Ross: No, the guy is mean. I mean, really mean. I think you should stay away from him.
Rachel: Hmm. Or maybe I should stay away from all men.
Ross: No. It's not just because I'm jealous. I mean, I'm not. I'm not jealous. Look, the guy screamed- He actually screamed at this couple sitting in our seats.
Chandler: Yeah, and at the end of the play, he got up, and he just started, like, banging his hands together.

Quote from Phoebe

Ross: I can't believe no one believes me.
Phoebe: I do. I believe you.
Ross: You do, Pheebs?
Phoebe: Yeah. But I also believed her when she said I was next.

Quote from Joey

Joey: And so, I'm gonna get on this spaceship and I'm gonna go to Blaargon-7 in search of alternative fuels. But when I return, you'll be long gone but I won't have aged at all. So you tell your great, great granddaughter, to look me up. Because, Adrianne, baby, I'm gonna want to meet her.

Quote from Phoebe

Monica: It's been two days.
Phoebe: Yeah, I know. Good thing it's one of those 801 numbers.
Ross: Phoebe, 800 is toll free. 801 is Utah.
Phoebe: No, no, no. It has to be 800 because all those big companies have 800 numbers.
Every- Yeah, every big Utah-based company has one.
Rachel: Sorry.
Phoebe: Sorry. I'm so sorry. I will pay you back.
Chandler: And yet she's still not hanging up the phone.
Rachel: Hang up!
Ross: Hang up the phone!
Phoebe: Fine! Fine! Oh.
Monica: What?
Phoebe: Well, I think I broke it. But that's all right. Here's the number where you can call.

Quote from Joey

Kate: You know I gave up a part on a soap for this?
Joey: Yeah, I gave up a job too.
Kate: Really? What?
Joey: Declawing cats.


 Episode 321 Episode 323 
  Select another episode