Leslie: Okay, my next song's called: "Phoebe Buffay, What Can I Say? I Really Loved When We Were Singing Partners and I Shouldn't Have Left You That Way."
Phoebe: Oh, no. One of those "Iook for the hidden meaning" songs.

Phoebe: You know what the saddest part is? When we were playing together, that was like the most fun I've ever had in all my lives.

Phoebe: [playing guitar and singing] Smelly cat, smelly cat, What are they feeding you? Smelly cat, smelly cat, It's not your fault.
Leslie: That's great. You know, you could totally sell this. It'd be perfect for, like, a kitty-litter campaign.
Phoebe: A jingle? No, no, no, no.
Leslie: Why not? You'd make a ton of money.
Phoebe: If I was in this for the money, I'd be a millionaire by now, you know. You gotta get out of that jingle-head, sweetie.

Joey: Whoa, that was kind of brutal.
Phoebe: Okay. Well let this be a lesson to all of you. All right, once you betray me, I become like the lce Woman, you know. I'm just very cold, hard, unyielding. You know, nothing can penetrate this icy exterior. Can I have a tissue, please?

Chandler: I like her.
Phoebe: Why? Because she can sing and play guitar and do both at the same time?
Chandler: Well, that's pretty much all I'm looking for from these people.

Phoebe: How'd you know I'd be here?
Leslie: I ran into Vlad at the place where they sell the big fish and he said you played here a lot, so-
Chandler: Okay, I have to go to the bathroom. But if the place with the big fish comes up again, I'd like to know if that's several big fish or just one big fish.

Phoebe: You know, we were best friends ever since we were little. Our moms worked on the barge together.
Monica: Aww, you two must've been so cute, running around on a barge.
Phoebe: You never run on a barge!

Joey: After dinner, me, her and Pepper fell asleep in front of the fire. I woke up in the middle of the night and saw the fire was dying out, so I picked up a log and threw it on. Or at least what I thought was a log.
Phoebe: Oh, my God. You threw Pepper on the fire.
Joey: I wish.

Chandler: Well, that's the best kiss I've had with anybody I met in a men's room.

Ross: I'm sorry, but if you're not working with him anymore why do you still hang out?
Rachel: Because he's my friend.
Ross: But do you really need another "friend"?
Rachel: Well, okay. If I stop playing with Joey and Chandler, can I play with Mark?