‘The One Where Rachel Is Late’
Season 8, Episode 22 - Aired May 9, 2002
As Rachel grows increasingly frustrated that she's late, she's willing to try anything to induce labor. Meanwhile, Joey invites Chandler to his film premiere, and Phoebe and Monica bet on when Rachel's baby will be born.
Quote from Phoebe
Monica: Just because he paid for your headshots, you're gonna take him? Joey, I don't think you're comprehending just how slutty this dress is.
Joey: It's not just the stuff he paid for. I mean, it's everything, you know? He read lines with me.
He went with me on auditions when I was really nervous. Then he consoled me after I didn't get parts that I really wanted. You always believed in me, man, even when I didn't believe in myself.
Chandler: I always knew you were gonna make it. I'm so proud of you.
Joey: Thanks, that means a lot to me.
Phoebe: Mon, maybe one of these guys wants to wear your dress.
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: I have to pee. If I don't come out in five minutes, it's because I've choked to death on the potpourri stink.
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: I have to go pee. Apparently this baby thinks my bladder is a squeeze toy.
Quote from Chandler
Chandler: How do I look?
Joey: A little tall.
Chandler: What?
Joey: Would you crouch down a bit so that I look taller? There you go.
Chandler: It's just so glamorous.
Quote from Phoebe
Phoebe: I'm sorry. I know how uncomfortable you are. You know what? You look great. Yeah, like 50 bucks.
Quote from Phoebe
Monica: Damn it. Damn it. Here's your 50 bucks.
Phoebe: It's interesting that you lost. Now, I forget, do you like to lose?
Quote from Ross
Ross: Rach, we gotta go.
Rachel: In a minute!
Ross: People ask me why we're not together. I just don't know what to tell them.
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: Ross, can I ask you something? When Carol was pregnant with Ben were you this irritating?
Ross: Wow.
Rachel: Excuse me?
Ross: Nothing. Nothing. You're just- You've been a little short with me lately. I'm not trying to irritate you.
Rachel: Well, then, you must have a natural talent for it.
Quote from Ross
Ross: The doctor will be in soon. Why don't we not speak until then?
Rachel: Seriously. Breathe louder, Ross. That's great.
Ross: You know, we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby that's half human, half pure evil.
Quote from Chandler
Chandler: Good job, Joe. Well done. Top-notch.
Joey: You liked it? You really liked it?
Chandler: Oh, yeah.
Joey: Well, which part exactly?
Chandler: The whole thing. Here we go.
Joey: No, no, no. Give me some specifics.
Chandler: I loved the specifics. The specifics were the best part.