Martin: Look, when I was a cop walking the beat, there was this one restaurant on the corner. In ten years, it must have changed hands twenty times. First, it was Ling Fun's Lychee Palace, then it was Tony's Meatball Hutch, then it was A Little Taste of Yorkshire. English food. Big surprise that lasted about five minutes.

Frasier: We'll make the place very, very exclusive. No sign on the outside, no advertisements and oh, an unlisted phone number!
Martin: Hey, well, don't stop there. Maybe you could post some guards on the roof who can shoot people as they try to get in.

Bulldog: Hey, Miles, baby!
Niles: Good evening, Mr. Briscoe. May I help you?
Bulldog: Does it look like I need help tonight?
Niles: Do you have a reservation?
Bulldog: Okay, okay, I know what you're sniffing around for. These guys are all alike. Mr. Lincoln wonders if you've got a table for the Bulldog and his lady.
Niles: Well, Mr. Lincoln's in luck. Please, seat these people in "The Enchanted Grotto."
Frasier: Niles, the Grotto? Oh, Bulldog, enjoy our finest table.

Roz: Okay, table four wants to make some changes: they want the sole veronique without the grapes, spinach instead of broccoli and risotto instead of pasta. They also want the swordfish but hold the capers.
Daphne: Oh, for heaven's sake, can't you just tell them no substitutions?
Roz: I have trouble saying no.
Niles: So the guidebooks tell us.
Roz: You want to get thrown in the tank with the rest of the eels?

Frasier: Not to worry, Gil, the eels are on their way.
Gil: Our mouths are watering, Frasier.
Frasier: Our chef is in the process of... [the lights flicker] ...frying them now.

Frasier: What was that?
Roz: Big blue flash. Cherries everywhere.
Daphne: Lucky it didn't set off the sprinkler system.
Frasier: Yes, fortunately, we have a built-in safety delay for just this sort of thing. It gives you fifteen seconds before the sprinklers... [The sprinklers start] ...kick in.
Daphne: Where do I turn that off?
Frasier: Right over there.
Niles: I hope you're satisfied! You've thinned my brown sauce!

Frasier: You know, we could tell people he died in the explosion.

Frasier: I've got it, Niles, I've got it! Le Freres Heureux.
Niles: "The Happy Brothers". Brilliant! It's homey, but just hard enough to pronounce to intimidate the riffraff!

Otto: Have you decided what you'd like?
Frasier: Yes. I'd like the whole damn place! Right from the wine cellar to the rafters!
Otto: And for the lady?

Niles: We're a hit, a palpable hit. Every table in the place is full. Except for that tiny one, wedged in that horrible
dank little corner next to the men's room.
Frasier: No, no, no, Niles. That is not a dank little corner next to the men's room. That is the "Enchanted Grotto."