Frasier: Now, Roz. At least she's trying. She did get you a gift, after all. And look, it's very chic and expensive, I'm sure.
Roz: Uh, and two sizes too small.
Frasier: All right, she's a bitch.
Roz: Thank you.

Kenny: You're up for best host and best informational special, which gives you the lifetime record for most nominations.
Frasier: Oh, my God, I'm, I'm so flattered. I hope you two will join me at my table.
Roz: Oh, those awards are torture. They're endless. Can I bring my sister?
Frasier: Of course.

Niles: Hi. Listen, Frasier, I'm so sorry, I have to cancel tonight. I'm going to hear Tony Bennett.
Frasier: Oh, really. Where's he playing?
Niles: At Frank Gehry's birthday party.

Niles: [answering the phone] Hello? Hello, Daphne. A delivery from Bill and Mindy! Aren't they sweet? No, don't uncrate it until I get home!

Roz: Why are you taking him to the SeaBeas?
Frasier: Because I want to see him at my best, Roz. Do you realize, I'm giving the opening remarks this year? And if I do say so myself, they will change you.
Roz: Yeah, from an awake person to a sleeping one.

Frasier: Perfect! All I was lacking was the appropriate piece of arm candy to accompany me and there she is.
Roz: Who's she?
Frasier: A neighbor of mine in the building, whose acquaintance I have recently made.
Roz: Oh, right. Daphne told me you pulled that old mail trick out of mothballs.

Frasier: Well, I've worked my magic. That magnificent creature will be accompanying me on Saturday night.
Roz: Frasier, the awards are Saturday morning.
Frasier: Well, of course they're not.
Roz: Yes, they are.
Frasier: Roz, who would ever plan an awards ceremony on a Saturday morning?
Roz: Kenny was in charge this year, he booked the room too late.
Caroline: [on her way out] See you this weekend.
Frasier: Yeah, bye-bye. Oh, don't forget I'll pick you up seven-thirty, Saturday morning. Bye-bye.

Roz: Oh, you can't blame her, Frasier. Who wants to get in hair and makeup at eight o'clock in the morning?
Frasier: Well, somebody better. I'm being profiled. It's going to look like I can't even scare up a date.
Roz: You scared that one pretty good.

Frasier: There's a face I'm happy to see.
Roz: Frasier.
Frasier: Not you, Roz. Listen, Denise, uh, could you do me a small favor?
Denise: Mm-hmm?
Frasier: You see, my date didn't show up and there's a reporter here today doing a story on me and could you pretend to be my date?
Denise: Well, sure. [to Roz] First the valet hits on me and now this.

Martin: Some spread. I got pigs-in-a-blanket lying on an omelet pillow. And check it out, it snowed cheese.