Niles Quote #445
Quote from Niles in Leapin' Lizards
Daphne: Evening, Dr. Crane. Did you bring Eddie's pills?
Niles: Yes, and the vet gave very specific instructions. "Take one tablet per hour or as needed until trembling subsides." I'm sorry, these are for Maris.
Features in the collection: The Maris Crane Files.
Frasier Quotes
‘The Maris Crane Files’
Quote from Frasier in The Good Son
Niles: Of course, I can't take care of him.
Frasier: Oh, yes, of course. Of course. Why?
Niles: Because Dad doesn't get along with Maris.
Frasier: Who does?
Niles: I thought you liked my Maris.
Frasier: I do. I like her from a distance. You know, the way you like the sun. Maris is like the sun, except without the warmth.
Quote from Niles in The Seal Who Came to Dinner
Niles: Let's get some lights on. [claps]
Frasier: Good Lord, what the hell is that?
Niles: Maris had it made after she lost power in a storm. Battery operated, works on a clapper so you can find it in the dark. Only problem was, the poor thing, try as she might, could never clap hard enough to activate it.
‘Leapin' Lizards’ Quotes
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with a man who's favorite t-shirt reads "Seattle Hooter Inspector".
Kate: Afraid of the competition?
Frasier: I am a doctor, I went ... to medical school. I will not embarrass myself by engaging in a grab for ratings.
Kate: You just announced to a half a million listeners that you are "filled to the brim with girlish glee." I think the H.M.S. Pinafore of embarrassment has sailed.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: Yes, I've tried dealing with this problem on my own but Bulldog insists on interrupting my show with his foolish pranks.
Kate: I heard.
Frasier: Yes, well I did not spend eight grueling years at Harvard to be mocked by that juvenile jackass.
Kate: Shameless.
Frasier: Oh, he's beyond shameless!
Kate: I'm talking about the way you manage to get Harvard into every conversation.
Frasier: Well, I'm sure you'll mention your alma mater, too, some day. When it's accredited.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: Well, that's one on me, or rather one on me and my call screener, Roz, whose ancestors were once heard remarking, "Oh, what a nice wooden horse, of course I'll sign for it."