Bulldog: I don't believe it. They just fired me.
Frasier: What?
Bulldog: Yeah. They said my ratings are low. The show's losing its edge. I'm getting soft. My last day's Friday.
Frasier: Oh, Bulldog, I'm so sorry. Are you all right?
Bulldog: No, I'm not. [hitting the counter weakly] This stinks. This is total B.S. [breaking into tears] You don't think I'm getting soft, do you?
Frasier: No, no, not at all. [handing him a tissue] Here.
Bulldog: [blowing his nose] I just thank God I got a girlfriend like you, Roz. I don't think I can face this alone.

Bulldog: Hey, look who's here. Hey, sweet pea, you are getting so big. Hey, look at that smile, she likes me.
Roz: She's relieved not to be the least mature person in the room anymore.
Bulldog: Who's got a mean old mommy?

Bulldog: [feeding Alice] Okay, one more bite, then we can watch Sports Center.

Bulldog: I guess no one quite measured up to that week you spent in the doghouse, huh?
Roz: Let's get one thing straight. That little fling we had...
Bulldog: I know, I know, I know. I was joking.

Bulldog: [to Alice] Okay. If you're not going to have some peaches, we've got some jello in the fridge. You know, some naughty ladies like to wrestle in that stuff.

Bulldog: Hey.
Steven: Oh. Excuse me, is this Roz Doyle's apartment?
Bulldog: Yeah, yeah. Are you her date?
Steven: Yeah.
Bulldog: Listen up, if you go out with Roz tonight, I will rip off your arm, ram it down your throat and use it to squeeze your heart until it stops beating. [to Alice] Who's my pretty girl? [grabs Steve] Okay, dirtball. As soon as you get out of here, you call Roz and you cancel like a gentleman. As far as she's concerned, this conversation never took place. Got it?
Steven: Who are you?
Bulldog: I'm your worse nightmare, the babysitter!

Bulldog: Whoa!
Roz: Do I look slutty?
Bulldog: All right, if you're fishing for compliments, yeah, you look slutty.

Bulldog: Well, I guess I can go. Oh, I ordered a pizza. Just have him drop it by my place. Oh, I'm at the YMCA. Oh, have him knock hard, I turn up the radio to drown out the sirens.

Roz: Come and tell us what you guys did at the park today.
Bulldog: We fed the ducks! We went on a pony ride and then came back for a whole jar of peas.
Roz: Peas? How'd you get her to eat those?
Bulldog: Oh, there's a trick to it. You've got to pretend to sneeze them out of your nose.
Roz: How did you come up with that?
Bulldog: It's an interesting story.
Roz: Actually, don't tell me.

Bulldog: Okay, what sorry bastard would steal a pacifier from a kid? This stinks! This is total B.S.! This is- Oh, found it. Found it.