Frank: Sammy boy, what have you been up to?
Sam: Well, actually, I'm finally going into business for myself, opening up my own office-supply store right here in Lynbrook. Maybe you've seen the signs. "The Office Supply Bin: Bin there, bought that."
Frank: Yeah, yeah, I know that sign. It's right next to the billboard with the bikini lady riding the beeper.
Sam: Yeah. So, anyway, since I was in the neighborhood, I just wanted to come by and thank you for being such an inspiration to me all those years ago. I owe a lot to you.
Frank: Don't mention it, kid. You like ham? Come on, strap on a feedbag.
Sam: Thanks, but no, I've got to get back to the store. We open in a week, and I've got a ton to do. But it would mean a lot to me if you'd come by and see the place sometime.
Frank: Well, yeah. Well, how about right now?
Sam: Really?
Robert: Dad, we're just about to sit down to eat.
Sam: I don't wanna take you away from your family.
Frank: Yeah, yeah. I'll go put on a nicer shirt.

Frank: Hey, you should see Sam's place. You know how many different kinds of envelopes he's got there?
Ray: 85.
Frank: 32. Don't be a wise-ass.

Frank: Marie, ham.
Marie: On the table congealing.

Debra: You know, Frank, just out of curiosity, what exactly did you do to inspire this fellow?
Frank: I don't know. I guess I just have that effect on people.
Ray: I think Sam's been spending too much time sniffing the Magic Markers.
Frank: Hey, knock it off. He's a real good guy.

Frank: You don't need to make me lunch, Marie. I'm taking Sam to the lodge to meet the boys.
Amy: Frank, wait.
Frank: What do you want?
Debra: Amy and I think that you and Ray and Robert need to talk.
Ray: Whoa, whoa. No, we don't.
Robert: We never said that.
Debra: Yes, you do. You wanna talk about this whole Sam situation.
Amy: You wanna clear the air and get out your feelings. Debra and I discussed it at the mall.
Ray: I hate that damn mall.

Debra: Ray, why don't you start by telling your father some of the things you were telling me last night?
Amy: You too, Robert.
Robert: I don't need to.
Amy: Yes, you do.
Robert: No, I don't.
Amy: Then why'd you punch a hole in the headboard last night?
Robert: I thought I heard a mouse back there.

Ray: Okay, it's just we couldn't help noticing that-that you really like this Sam guy and you were an inspiration to him and everything, and we kind of got jack.
Robert: Squat. Jack squat.
Frank: Jack squat? Give me a break.
Debra: See, Frank, maybe this is the attitude-
Ray: Stop! This is the attitude!
Robert: The same jack-squat attitude that proves the thesis of our discontent.
Frank: I don't know what you're talking about, but it sounds like fruity whining to me.

Frank: I was a great father.
Ray: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You gave us great inspiration, great advice. "Quit crying! You got plenty of blood!"
Robert: "Don't screw up. You're big. Everyone will notice more!"
Frank: You done? Goodbye!
Amy: Wait! You can't leave this way! [Amy barricades herself against the door]
Frank: Out of my way, sister.
Amy: I may be new here, but I know this family well enough to know that you boys love each other, and I know exactly what you need.
Robert: What are you doing? He'll eat you.
Amy: I think you boys need to hug.

Frank: I'm late for lunch. The lodge will know I'm missing.
Marie: You'd better hope that your lodge is open for three meals a day for the rest of your life. If you don't hug these boys, my kitchen is closed.

Ray: All right, could we stop? The smells from my childhood are starting to come back.
Robert: Did we have a monkey?