Ray: Let me ask ya something. Now that you and Amy are gettin' married, what's the one special thing that you two have that a group of people would wanna hear about?
Robert: You've got nothin' for the toast.
Ray: I got plenty. What do you got?

Peter: Guys, look, this is really hard for me. Um, I've had some issues with this whole marriage agenda, but I've had some time to reflect, and I realize that I may have been a wiener.
Robert: That's okay, Peter.
Peter: No, it's not okay. We're gonna be family, and I just I want to be able to call you guys, both of you, brother-man.
Ray: All right. Okay.
Peter: Welcome to our lives.
Robert: Okay. It's all right. Thank you. Thank you, Peter.
Peter: Well, thank you. And now, I shall take my leave. Have a great day. [exits]

Robert: That psycho's gonna pull some crap. Now, listen. You gotta stick with him, Raymond. Go. Go now. You gotta follow him.
Ray: I don't want to be-
Robert: Listen, listen, just do it. He's gonna wreck the wedding. That guy has squirrels jugglin' knives in his head.
Ray: No, wait wait. Before I go, one thing funny and then heartfelt.
Robert: Go!

Frank: Look out. I got egg and cheese sandwich on my crotch.

Pat: Oh my, we're supposed to get started in five minutes, and I haven't seen Reverend Stevens yet. Peter.
Peter: Yes, Mama?
Pat: Honey, you picked up Reverend Stevens this morning, didn't you?
Peter: Well, yes, of course, I did, Mama. I have no idea where that rascal could've gotten to, but I'm on it.

Pat: [o.s.] Are you in there, Peter?
Peter: Yes, Mama, I am. Come on in.
Pat: Oh, hello. Peter, we found Reverend Stevens. You can stop looking.
Peter: Oh, thank goodness.
Pat: Everything all right in here?
Peter: Yes, everything's fine, Mama. Everything's great. Hey, I think it's weddin' time, isn't it? Places, everyone. Oh, good luck out there.

Debra: So feel different?
Amy: Yeah.
Robert: Life is good. [holds up champagne glass, snaps the stem]
Debra: Yes. You're married. You two looked beautiful up there, and... you've got your health.

Marie: Oh, hello! Oh, I thought the ceremony was beautiful. Didn't you, Robbie?
Robert: I'll never forget it.
Marie: I am so happy. And you know what? I'm actually starving. I forgot to eat today, what with all I had to do. I'll catch up with you later.

Debra: Marie, I need to say something.
Marie: I know. Can you believe this food?
Frank: Marie, we're leaving. Drop the meat.
Marie: What? We can't leave. I'm the mother of the groom. No matter how horrible the food is, I have to stay.
Pat: Hello.
Marie: Oh, Pat, what a wonderful spread.

Ray: All right. All right, that's enough. Can I speak to you in private, please, Mrs. MacDougall? [they walk away from Marie & Frank] Nobody's ever said that to her before. You're cool.
Pat: Thank you, Ray, but I don't feel cool. I feel like I just contributed to the whole tone of the wedding, which is bad. And it's ruined, and that's the last thing I wanted to do for my daughter and her new husband. [sobs on Ray's shoulders]
Ray: Why do I talk to people?