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‘Fun with Debra’ Quotes

Everybody Loves Raymond: Fun with Debra

801. Fun with Debra

Aired September 22, 2003

Debra thinks she and Ray should spend more time together, so she joins him on the golf course.

Quote from Frank

Debra: You know, Marie, I think I already found something I like.
Marie: Yes, but you have to consider all your options.
Frank: That's true there, Debra. You've gotta choose carefully when it's something you're gonna be looking at for the rest of your life.

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Quote from Marie

Marie: How was your golf date?
Ray: It was really nice.
Debra: Yeah. Boy, that's the most fun we've had in a long time.
Marie: Oh, then you really recommend this spending the day together?
Ray: Absolutely. Makes you feel young.
Debra: Yeah.
Marie: Oh, I'm so jealous. Frank, I don't care what you say. Tomorrow I'm spending the day with Raymond.

Quote from Marie

Marie: You should have told me you were picking up paint samples. I could have gone with you.
Debra: Oh, what was I thinking?
Marie: Well, no matter. Sit down, sweetheart. You know, when I heard that you were looking for new colors for the bedroom, I brought over my own samples. This is from when paint was good.

Quote from Frank

Ray: So, what's Super Special Daddy getting for Super Special Supper?
Debra: This was supposed to be the kids' day, and you dragged them around the golf course?
Ray: What are you talking about? They had a great time. I thought the whole point was for me and the kids to spend some time together and have fun, huh? Like when Dad used to take me and Robert to the lodge instead of the playground.
Marie: You took my babies to your disgusting lodge?
Frank: Never happened. I don't know what he's talking about.
Ray: Oh, what? It was fun. Collecting bottle caps and learning how to play pool. Dad, remember you would get a beer and you'd let me and Robert suck the foam off the top of it?
Marie: You let my Raymond have beer?
Frank: Made a man out of him! Almost.

Quote from Frank

Frank: Hey, Ray, remember at the lodge when the guys tried to get you to smoke a cigarette and you swallowed it? [laughs] You threw up funny.

Quote from Ray

Debra: It's not just that. They enjoy each other. They enjoy each other's company. They enjoy being together. You remember what that was like?
Ray: Well so what, you wanna have like a picnic or something?
Debra: No. You know what I was thinking? Why don't we go golfing together? Come on, Ray. I mean, you know, you love golf, and I wanna be a part of that. It could be fun. You could teach me. Come on, Ray. I mean, you know, golf is your thing. You read about it, you watch it, you wear your nicest clothes to it... I wanna be a part of that.
Ray: Listen, golf... Golf, it's a frustrating game, all right? And it's really hot out there. And- And if there's lightning, you could be killed. [off Debra's look of disappointment] All right. Listen if- If you want to go golfing... [freezes mid-sentence] We'll go. Because you're my girlfriend.
Debra: Yeah?
Ray: Yeah. Yeah. And- And if there's lightning, I'll step in front of you and take it in the head.

Quote from Marie

Debra: Sorry we're late. The kids give you any trouble?
Marie: [points to Frank] Just the big ugly one.

Quote from Ray

Debra: Where are you going? I told you yesterday I was going to pick out paint colors for the bedroom today.
Ray: I told you I wanted to go golfing.
Debra: Yeah, and I said, "Too bad."
Ray: I thought that meant for you.
Debra: Ray, I'm going to the hardware store. You only have to watch the boys 'cause Ally's at Molly's.
Ray: Look, I'll spend the whole day with them tomorrow, okay? I promise. I'll even, I'll skip church, okay? I'll give my kids the time I normally reserve for the Lord.

Quote from Debra

Debra: Do you want to be any part of their childhood memories?
Ray: [scoffs] "Childhood memories." Come on. Ask them about their trip to Disney World. They don't even remember it.
Debra: They were three.
Ray: Tiger Woods could hit a ball 20 yards when he was three.
Debra: Okay, Ray. Go ahead, you go golfing. I'll drag them around with me all day. I'm sure they'll have a wonderful time looking at paint samples.
Ray: There you go.
Debra: You put those golf clubs down, spend some time with your kids, and create some damn memories!
Ray: All right! Maybe you should worry about the memories I'm gonna have of you.

Quote from Ray

Ray: All right. That concludes our Super Special Daddy Day. Who do we love?
Twins: Daddy!
Ray: That's me.
Debra: That's great!
Marie: Oh, it looks like you boys had fun.
Geoffrey: We went to Daddy's golf course.
Debra: Daddy's golf course?
Ray: Well, I played like I owned the place.
Frank: Why are you all wet?
Ray: Oh yeah, I let them play in the sand trap, and then I hit some balls into the little creek so they could go get them and rinse off.
Debra: You what?
Ray: Yeah, it was great. It was like an underwater Easter-egg hunt. Aw, they loved it.

Quote from Frank

Debra: This is your defense. Him?
Ray: Yeah. We were happy 'cause we were with our dad. And that's why the boys had a good time.
Debra: Doing what you want to do.
Ray: The boys had fun. To quote them, "Ya-hoo."
Marie: They did seem happy.
Frank: Next time, give them some beer.

Quote from Ray

Ray: Oh boy, those kids really wore me out today. I've probably got just enough strength to make love, and that's it.

Quote from Ray

Debra: So you really spent the whole day on the golf course with the kids?
Ray: Wait a minute. Didn't I already win this argument?
Debra: I know, but it's just... I don't know. It seemed like you had such a good time together.
Ray: You told me to.
Debra: Well, what about me?
Ray: What do you mean? You can have a good time with them every day if you want. Do it tomorrow. I can go golfing without the noise, you know. I didn't want to say anything, but they cost me, like, four strokes.

Quote from Ray

Debra: Not me and them. Me and you.
Ray: What?
Debra: I mean, you can have such a fun time with the kids. Why can't you have fun with me?
Ray: I was just trying to have fun with you.
Debra: You were trying to have sex with me
Ray: Sex is fun. Especially with me, 'cause I whistle.

Quote from Debra

Debra: You remember when we were boyfriend and girlfriend, we used to go to concerts and bowling, baseball games... everything. We used to have fun.
Ray: Look, I didn't know that you were still interested in having fun.
Debra: What are you talking about? Of course I am.
Ray: Well, all right, but you gotta tell me. I'm not a mind reader.
Debra: All right, okay. You know what? I am telling you right now, I want to have fun with you.
Ray: Okay.
Debra: Non-sexual fun.

Quote from Ray

Ray: Where is this coming from? Were you reading one of those magazines in the beauty parlor?
Debra: No, Ray. But I did happen to get a postcard from Amy and Robert today.
Ray: Oh, Amy and Robert! "Oh, oh, we're in ltaly. Oh, let's share a piece of spaghetti together and then we can slurp it till we meet in the middle."
Debra: "We're having such a great time together. It's absolutely magical."
Ray: They're on their honeymoon! Guess what they're doing a lot of.

Quote from Debra

Debra: There you are.
Ray: Hey.
Debra: I was just in the gift shop. You didn't par off without me, did you?
Ray: No, no. No, I didn't- I didn't tee off. Tee off.
Debra: Right. Look, I got us visors.
Ray: Hey, hey! Great, yeah. Hey, they match. "l love birdies."
Debra: Yeah. I mean, I know it doesn't have anything to do with golf, but I just thought they were cute.

Quote from Debra

Debra: Oh my gosh, Ray, that was great!
Ray: Yeah, that'll work.
Debra: No, really, Ray, that was awesome. I had no idea you were so good. My gosh, you were like one of those pros on TV.
Ray: No. Yeah?
Debra: Yeah! Wow!
Ray: You know, I got my hips through on that one.
Debra: Hit another one.
Ray: No, don't worry. There'll be plenty more times to amaze you.

Quote from Ray

Debra: Sorry, guys. We'll get out of your way.
Ray: All right. Hey, guys, if my wife calls, tell her I'm with my girlfriend.
Debra: Oh!

Quote from Ray

Debra: Okay, honey, slice it in.
Ray: [to himself] Oh, you gotta hit it, you idiot!
Debra: Um, you know what?
Ray: What?
Debra: Nothing. It's just I noticed that your thumbs aren't really on top of your grip.
Ray: Oh yeah. Yeah, you're right. Okay.
Debra: Good shot, honey.
Ray: Yeah, a bogey.
Debra: Are you okay? You didn't mind me correcting you, did you?
Ray: No, not at all. I love it at home, why wouldn't I love it on the golf course? [off Debra's look] I'm joking. Golfers, they zing each other all the time. They zing-zing! Come on, next hole!

Quote from Debra

Debra: Wow! Did you see how far that went? It landed on the smooth part! Ray?
Ray: What?
Debra: You weren't watching?
Ray: I was-- I was adjusting my visor.
Debra: You know, I watch all your shots. Would it kill you to watch mine?
Ray: I'm sorry. You should have said something.
Debra: I did. I said, "Here I go."
Ray: You did?
Debra: Yes. You don't listen to me at home, so why should you listen to me on the golf course? Zing-zing.

Quote from Ray

Ray: Can you back up a couple feet?
Debra: What's the problem?
Ray: Your shadow is in my way.
Debra: What?
Ray: It's- It's right in front of the hole.
Debra: And my shadow's going to stop your ball?
Ray: No, it's- It's just- Look, could you just back up a couple steps? Damn it!
Debra: The ball barely even made it to where my shadow was.
Ray: Because you got me all nuts!

Quote from Ray

Ray: Can't even make a frickin' putt!
Debra: I don't think it's your putter's fault, Ray.
Ray: You're right. It's not the putter.
Debra: What?
Ray: It's you.
Debra: Excuse me?
Ray: You know, when we started today, you were all, "Oh, you're great, Ray. You're like a pro, Ray."
Debra: Yeah, well, you're not exactly the same guy I teed off with either. You went from hugging and kissing me to not wanting to have anything to do with me or my shadow.
Ray: I stopped hugging you when you started yelling, "l need my space." What happened to all the boyfriend-girlfriend crap?
Debra: Boyfriends are supposed to pay attention to their girlfriends.
Ray: Yeah? Well, we're married now.

Quote from Ray

Debra: You're still supposed to want to be with me. You're still supposed to listen to me.
Ray: Oh, God. Look, I'm sorry that I missed your shot.
Debra: It's not about the shot!
Ray: Well, then why'd you bring it up, huh? Golfing, we're supposed to have fun here! And you know what? I always do have fun when I come here. But not today. Hmm, I wonder what's different about today.
Debra: What's different about today is that I made a big effort to do something you love so we could be together.
Ray: That's not why you did it.
Debra: Yes, it is!
Ray: No, I think you did it so it would ruin what I love so I don't love it anymore.
Debra: What?!
Ray: Yes, that's right! Right. So all I would want to do is stay home and listen to you all day. And then when you sleep, I should take out a pad and sketch you!

Quote from Debra

Debra: How dare you say I came here to ruin golf for you!
Ray: Well then, why'd you come?!
Debra: Forget it, Ray. It's obvious that you don't even want me here.
Ray: Well, maybe I don't. Maybe I need my space too!
Debra: You're right, Ray. You're right. But, you know, maybe it would help your argument if we were even a little bit connected at home. But it doesn't happen there either. Maybe I do want what Amy and Robert have. Maybe I do want what we had. But I shouldn't have come here. Sorry. I'm sorry.

Quote from Ray

Ray: I'm sorry. I'm gonna I'm gonna work on all those things that you were talking about. I wanna have fun with you too. I like being with you. I just- You know, I guess it's it's easy to forget after you've been married for 12 years.
Debra: 13.
Ray: I guess it just feels like 12 because we have so much fun.


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