‘Everybody Hates Fat Mike’
Season 1, Episode 5 - Aired October 20, 2005
Chris goes against his parent's wishes and lends his bike to a neighbor kid. Meanwhile, Julius takes on more of the household duties when he's off work because of a strike.
Quote from Chris
Fat Mike: Hey, man. You want to take a ride down to the park?
Chris: I can't go off the block.
Fat Mike: Well, can I take a ride on your bike?
Chris: Can't let anybody ride it.
Fat Mike: I'm only going to the corner.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Cool guys always have a way of making you feel like a punk if you don't do what they say.
Chris: All right, I guess so. But it's only down to the corner.
Fat Mike: Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
[Fat Mike rides to the end of the block and then turns the corner]
Chris: Fat Mike! Fat Mike!
Rochelle: Boy, stop all the hollering and put your bike up. It's time to come in.
Quote from Rochelle
Tonya: Daddy showed me how to fold napkins.
Rochelle: Julius, what's all this?
Julius: Hey, babe, how are you doing? You were working, so I wanted to have dinner ready for you. I cleaned the house too.
Tonya: Daddy washed and ironed all my school clothes.
Drew: Mine, too. He even sewed up the holes in my socks.
Rochelle: Did he, now? Looks like you were really busy today.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] You would think my mother would be happy that my father was helping out. But if losing his job was bad, doing her job was worse.
Julius: You want to eat?
Rochelle: No, I'm not that hungry.
Quote from Julius
Julius: Uh, did you bring your bike in?
Chris: Yeah.
Julius: You didn't let anybody ride it?
Chris: No!
Julius: Good. These guys around here will steal it.
Quote from Julius
Julius: Got that sausage.
Drew: I'm full, Dad.
Chris: Me, too. Those biscuits were good.
Julius: Made 'em from scratch.
Tonya: Hey, Dad, can we have bacon tomorrow?
Julius: Anything for you, baby.
Quote from Chris
Julius: Chris, I was in the basement. I didn't see your bike.
Chris: I put it under a sheet so it wouldn't get dirty.
Rochelle: Not my good sheets?
Chris: No, ma'am.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] If my parents found out about my bike, this was gonna be my last meal.
Quote from Julius
Tonya: Daddy, can you fix my doll's dress? It ripped.
Rochelle: Oh, I can do that for you, baby.
Tonya: Oh, I want Dad to do it. He sews good.
Julius: "Well," I sew well.
Rochelle: I guess you do.
Quote from Rochelle
Drew: Dad, this is good. What's this called?
Julius: It's nothing. Just...
Chris: Mmm, it tastes like syrup.
Julius: It's maple barbecue baked chicken.
Rochelle: Is that why it's so sweet?
Quote from Rochelle
Rochelle: Hey, need any help with the dishes?
Julius: Oh, no, baby, I got it. Don't worry about it.
Rochelle: Yeah, well, I guess I'm going to go to bed, then.
Julius: Okay.
Rochelle: When do you think this strike is going to end?
Julius: I don't know. They're still trying to figure out who's going to pay for the truck signs.
Rochelle: Well, I hope they figure it out soon.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Only a woman can make you feel wrong for doing right.
Quote from Chris
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I looked everywhere for Fat Mike. Well, considering I didn't go past the corner, everywhere was about a block.
Rochelle: Hey, baby. It's getting late, so why don't you get your bike and come inside for dinner I'm sure your father made some fantastic meal.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I figured maybe if I told her about my bike outside, she wouldn't kill me because of all the witnesses.
Chris: Mom, Mom, Mom. I got to tell you something.
Rochelle: What is it?
Chris: [sees Fat Mike return with his bike] I love your cooking.
Rochelle: Thank you, baby. Get your bike and come on inside.