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‘The Last Picture Show’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

Cheers: The Last Picture Show

1118. The Last Picture Show

Aired February 25, 1993

Norm, Cliff, Woody and Frasier spend the night at a drive-in that's about to be torn down. Meanwhile, Sam lets the previous owner of Cheers, Gus O'Malley (Pat Hingle), run the bar for the evening.

Quote from Woody

Cliff: So, uh, what'd I miss? Why- Why is that girl, uh, running around screaming at everybody?
Norm: Well, she's trying to convince them that, uh, that Godzilla's merely confused and not really trying to hurt them.
Cliff: Isn't that the part usually played by Akiro Nakamoto?
Norm: Yeah, yeah. But, uh, she left halfway through the Godzilla series.
Woody: I don't understand. Why would an actress leave right in the middle of a successful series?

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Quote from Woody

Frasier: So, this is your precious drive-in? [chuckles] Tin box squawking in our ears, endless parade of people walking in front of the car, a man in a rubber dragon suit stepping on miniature Japanese houses.
Norm: Yeah, you believe they're gonna tear this place down?
Woody: You guys, this couldn't really happen, could it? Hmm? I mean, don't think I'm stupid or anything, but I mean, you know, if there really was atomic testing offshore, and it woke up a dinosaur, and it got affected by the radiation, I mean, you know, not exactly like this, but maybe something pretty close?
Norm: Woody, Woody, Woody, when are you gonna grow up? [chuckles] Course it could happen.

Quote from Cliff

Cliff: Boy, oh, boy, you know, I'll never forget Ma used to take me down there all bundled up in my pyjamas and all, you know. Yeah, as a matter of fact, it was at the Twi-Lite that I first saw Herbie, the Love Bug.
Norm: Cliffie, Herbie, the Love Bug came out in, uh, 1969, and you were born in, uh...
Sam: Oh, please, man, don't. Don't do the math.

Quote from Sam

Sam: I bought this place from Gus.
Gus O'Malley: Yeah.
Woody: Sam, you've been had. You already own this bar.
Gus O'Malley: You must be Coach's boy.
Sam: It's a good guess, but, no, he, uh... Actually, you know, uh, Coach passed away several years ago.
Gus O'Malley: Oh, that's too bad.
Sam: Yeah.

Quote from Carla

Carla: Boy, I've been going to that place ever since I was a teenager. Of course a lot of the stuff I saw there was pretty hard core.
Sam: They didn't show those kind of movies there.
Carla: Who said they did?

Quote from Cliff

Sam: No, you can't go to a, a drive-in in a Beemer, man. You need a classic convertible.
Frasier: Okay, okay. I'm sold. So where do we get one?
Norm: Well, Cliff, your mom has a convertible, doesn't she?
Cliff: No!
Norm: What do you mean? I saw her just the other day. She was driving a convertible.
Cliff: Now, look, Norm, there's a lot of beautiful women driving around in convertibles, all right?
Woody: Mr. Clavin, you wouldn't be afraid to ask your mom to borrow the car, would you?
Cliff: I'm not gonna dignify that with a yes.

Quote from Frasier

Frasier: Oh, look, please, you know, you guys, I don't know, your attraction to the drive-in experience, it just eludes me. I mean, no wonder they're tearing all these places down.
Norm: Yeah, maybe you're right.
Woody: Yeah.
Norm: Maybe there is something to being out on Friday night, and you're hanging out with all your pals and watching the movie. I guess those days are gone.
Frasier: Gentlemen, may I suggest that you are not mourning the loss of this drive-in, but rather the loss of your youth.

Quote from Carla

TV Reporter: [on TV] We're going live now to the Route 93 overpass, where an unidentified woman has climbed to the outside rail and is threatening to jump. An emergency rescue team has had no luck so far in persuading the woman to climb down from her dangerous perch.
Frasier: Oh, boy. As one who has been there, it is imperative that they do nothing to agitate that woman.
Cliff: Boy, oh, boy. I mean, what what has to go wrong with your life to be driven to such desperate measures, huh?
TV Reporter: We have a tentative identification. The woman is Anna Cosetti of Boston.
Carla: Sam, can I take the afternoon off?
Sam: Why?
Carla: I gotta go look after the kids; That woman's my babysitter.

Quote from Norm

Norm: Well, I like drive-ins. All the great memories I have of that place. You know what I love most about that place? It has that, that great hot, fresh popcorn, and they use real butter there, not that imitation yellow stuff.
Cliff: Isn't that where you proposed to Vera there, Norm?
Norm: Yeah. Anyway, do you know any place that has real butter these days? I don't.

Quote from Norm

Woody: What about you, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Well, I'm in, Wood, but, uh, I can't go to the snack bar for you guys. When I was a teenager, l, uh, ran up quite a tab at that place.
Frasier: Well, how big?
Norm: Well, they are closing down, aren't they?

Quote from Sam

Gus O'Malley: Sam Malone!
Sam: Yes.
Gus O'Malley: You know who I am?
Sam: No, sir, I don't, but I swear to you, I never touched your daughter.
Gus O'Malley: Nah, nah, you bought this bar from me 17 years ago. Although, now that you mention it, you did touch my daughter.

Quote from Norm

Gus O'Malley: It feels so great to be back here in this old saloon! Boy, I could... Listen, do you think I could, I could pop back here, you know, and maybe serve up one little drink? You know, just for old times' sake?
Sam: Yeah. Do it. Go on.
Gus O'Malley: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. This brings it all back. It's like I never left.
Norm: Uh, could I have a beer, please, Gus?
Gus O'Malley: Sure, Norm.
Norm: Something's different. Gus is back!
Gus O'Malley: How you been, Norm?
Norm: I'm all right. Can't complain.
Gus O'Malley: Yeah. How is that lovely bride of yours? What, what was her name again?
Norm: Vera.
Gus O'Malley: Oh, yeah. Vera. Boy, I remember when they were newly-wed. You'd come in here every night and make those goo-goo eyes at each other.
Cliff: You're kidding me. Norm and Vera?
Gus O'Malley: Oh, yeah, yeah. He'd recite poetry to her all the time. He'd put quarter after quarter in that jukebox, and he'd slow dance with Vera until closing. You remember that, Norm?
Norm: Just give me the beer, Gus.

Quote from Norm

Norm: Wood, you want to make the, uh, first, uh, run to the snack bar, please?
Woody: Sure. What do you guys want?
Frasier: Well, I'll have a mineral water and a decaf cap, and, um... Oh! Bring me some Toblerone chocolate.
Norm: You really don't get the drive-in experience, do you?
Frasier: I'm trying.
Cliff: Hey, uh, listen, if we're talking about having messy snacks in the car, I guess it's apropos to go over Ma's rules as regards the food and beverage service. Uh, Norm, you want to get the, uh, flyers out of the glove compartment there, please?
Norm: Cliff, uh, listen... Tell you what? While I pass out these, uh, flyers, why don't you go ahead and get the, uh, snacks, okay? We'll save time that way.
Cliff: Oh, capital idea. Very efficient. Be back in a flash.
Norm: Okay. Ma's rule number one- ditch the mail-man. [engine starting]

Quote from Frasier

Man: [o.s.] Hey, put that thing down! We're trying to watch a movie!
Frasier: Let me handle this, Norm. [car horn honking] I'm a great believer in the retort courteous. [shouts] Why don't you move your car, butt head?!
Norm: Yep.
Woody: Good work, Dr. Crane. They stopped honking.
Frasier: Many an upperclassman was afraid of the lash of my tongue. [A large man approaches the car] Well, you know, Norm, I think you were way out of line with that "butt head" crack.

Quote from Woody

Frasier: Well, you know, it's been a pretty miserable night, actually. What do you say we call it a night and head home?
Cliff: Oh, no you don't, Doc. We went through all this so we could have a good time at the drive-in, and that's exactly what we're gonna do.
Frasier: Oh, come on, Cliff. There's only one more movie. We all know what's gonna happen. There's gonna be atomic testing, Godzilla's gonna wake up, gets mad, goes and eats Tokyo, fights some other monster, disappears into the ocean. The end.
Woody: Oh, well, thanks a lot, Dr. Crane.

Quote from Carla

Cliff: Oh, my God.
Norm: What's that, Cliff?
Cliff: They're closing the Twi-Lite Drive-In.
Norm: Oh, you're joking, man.
Cliff: No, not at all. Yeah, yeah. Another American icon destroyed by the bulldozer. What are they gonna close next?
Carla: Hopefully, your mouth.

Quote from Rebecca

Sam: You look great. What've- What've you been doing?
Gus O'Malley: I moved to Arizona with the wife. Been living off my life savings. Believe me, if you manage this place right, it can really provide for you in your old age.
Sam: It can?
Gus O'Malley: Oh, yeah. It's all in the management.
Rebecca: [enters] Oh Sam, I'm gonna use the petty cash to buy lottery tickets. The way I figure it, it's our only hope.

Quote from Cliff

Cliff: Sorry I'm late. Got the car. Everything's all set.
Frasier: Great. How'd you get your mother to part with her precious vehicle?
Cliff: Oh, I just, uh, poured a couple of glasses of wine, cranked the heat up to full, and, uh, she'll sleep till Saturday.

Quote from Frasier

Frasier: Listen, I want to thank you guys for letting me come along. Horseplay, you know. Camaraderie. Hanging out with the guys and having fun is something that's been sorely missed in my life. I'm really looking forward to this drive-in thing.
Norm: Yeah, well, in that case, I suggest we make you trunk boy.
Frasier: Wow, trunk boy! Don't know what it is, but it sounds fun.

Quote from Carla

Sam: Gus, listen. You know, with Woody leaving to go to the drive-in and everything, I'm a little short-handed. What do you say you hop behind the bar here and let me put you on salary for a night?
Gus O'Malley: Nah, you kids don't want an old buzzard back there.
Sam: Yeah, of course. Come on.
Carla: It'd be so great. You know, it'd be like having a little piece of history behind the bar, you know? Take us back to our roots. Besides, we really like you, Gus.
Gus O'Malley: Well, all right, all right. I'll do it.
Carla: Hey, Sammy?
Sam: Yeah.
Carla: As long as we got the old geezer, I'm gonna take the night off.

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