Woody: I'm gonna get that guy. I'm gonna get him good.
Sam: Oh, come on, Woody. What do you- How can you get him, man? He's rich, he's smart, he's in good shape, he's tough; hangs out with a better class of people...
Norm & Cliff: Hey!
Sam: You know what I'm talking about, guys.
Norm & Cliff: Oh, yeah, yeah. Hey!

Woody: Now, how could I get that Nash guy?
Sam: Woody? Woody, I think it's kind of obvious, if you know what I mean.
Woody: Beat up his girlfriend?
Carla: I don't think you could.
Sam: Whoa. Come on. Now think with me here. Think. Now, have you met anybody recently, kind of cute, you know? Somebody who smells good and has hair down to here?
Woody: I'm interested in what you're saying, Sam, but I just had a thought. If I went out with that girl, I could make Nash real jealous.
All: [chant] Woody! Woody! Woody!
Woody: I'm back!

Rebecca: This has been a fabulous day. As I walked through the halls of headquarters, I received nothing but kudos for my fantastic party yesterday. Mr. Gaines said I displayed leadership, imagination and class. I am it. Woody: That's great, Miss Howe. Listen, do you think it'd be okay if I took an hour off?
Rebecca: Of course, Woody, take two. You deserve it.
Woody: Oh, great. I'm going to go ask your boss for permission to date his daughter, okay?
Rebecca: Okay. [runs after Woody] No!

Woody: And so, Mr. Gaines, please allow me to stress again, in the strongest way possible, that my being here in no way reflects upon Miss Rebecca Howe or her chance for advancement in your corporation.
Mr. Gaines: I'll take that under advisement. Now, if you'll please get on with your business?
Woody: Yes, sir. My business is that I'd like permission to date your daughter Kelly. I think you'll find that I'm generous, hardworking, friendly, cheerful, and honest. [Mr. Gaines laughs] Oh, yeah, and I'm funny, too.
Mr. Gaines: Well presented, young man. And a charming, old-fashioned gesture, besides.
Nash: Ready to hit the links, Walter?
Woody: In a minute, Nash. Anyway, as you can see, your visit has been in vain, Mr. Boyd. My daughter Kelly has been dating young Nash here for some years now.
Nash: Well, Boyd, how's that chin healing?
Woody: Never mind my chin, how's your ring?

Kelly: Thanks again for a wonderful evening, Woody. You introduced me to a whole new world.
Woody: Yeah, it's hard to believe a girl like you has never been to a monster truck and tractor pull before.
Norm: Oh, Woody! On the first date! How you going to top that, buddy?
Woody: Well, there's no need to top it. It's a one-shot deal.
Norm: Wh- What do you mean? What?
Woody: I mean, the only reason she went out with me was to make a point with her boyfriend.
Cliff: Wait, wait, wait, how do you know that?
Woody: 'Cause she told me. I mean, it only seems fair. The only reason I went out with her was to get revenge at her boyfriend. At least that's what I told her.
Norm: Woody, that is beautiful. That's the kind of honesty that's going to keep you out of marriage.

Nash: Kelly. Your dad said I might find you here.
Kelly: Nash, I know what you're going to say, and I don't want to hear it. I'm tired of being treated like chattel.
Woody: Excuse me, I think that's pronounced cattle.
Nash: You know, when I heard what you were up to, I got really mad. Then l, well, I realized, you couldn't possibly be doing this for your own enjoyment, so you must be doing it to prove a point to me. And I have to say, point well taken. This has been a humbling experience for me. Nothing personal.
Woody: That's okay, I didn't understand it.

Kelly: Well, thanks again for a fun evening.
Woody: Kelly?
Kelly: What?
Woody: Nothing.
Kelly: Do you have something you want to say to me, Woody?
Woody: No. I had a great time. It was nice meeting you. I was really happy to get to know you. I guess I did have something to say to you.
Kelly: So, I guess we should be leaving.
Woody: Yeah, I guess I should be getting back to work.
Kelly: Well, have fun working.
Woody: Yeah, have fun leaving.

Woody: Hey, Miss Howe? Can I leave now? Take Kelly out? I promise I'll work a double next week.
Rebecca: Oh, don't worry about it. Go, go ahead. Have a good time. And if you want to stay out real late and get married, then come in anytime tomorrow.
Woody: You're the greatest, Miss Howe.

Woody: Okay, let's hurry. If we get there by 6:00, we can sit at the Pac-Man table.
Kelly: What's a Pac-Man?
Woody: Oh, Kelly, I have so much to teach you.

Carla: Wait a minute, wait a minute! I can't leave here. Look, if you're gonna fight, go fight in the back. But remember, you gotta bus your own blood.
Woody: Let's go.
Guys: [chant] Woody, Woody, Woody, Woody, Woody, Woody, Woody... [blow lands, body thuds] Rich guy! Rich guy! Rich guy! Rich guy!