Coach: Oh, hi.
Diane: Hello.
Coach: I hope nobody told you the bus goes by here.
Sam: No, Coach, she's going to be sitting here for a while-
Diane: Uh, excuse me. I hate to keep asking for special attention, but could you not discuss my private life with everyone?
Sam: What would you like me to tell him?
Diane: I don't care.
Sam: She's a hooker.
Coach: Yeah?
Diane: Thank you.
Sam: Don't mention it.

Carla: Hiya, Coach.
Coach: Hi, Carla. Hey, Patriots finally got the linebacker they needed, huh?
Carla: Are you nuts? They're up to their ears in linebackers!
Coach: You know, that's true. They do have a lot of linebackers.

Carla: Whoa, I love to see a woman who isn't afraid to take her luggage out for a drink.
Sam: Carla, she doesn't want to be disturbed.
Carla: Oh. Well, tell Her Nibs I'm sorry.

Carla: You know, Sam once struck out Cash, Kaline and Freehan with a tying run on second.
Diane: [uninterested] Oh.
Carla: How long is the wimp convention in town?
Sam: Carla, heel.

Carla: So, what's Goldilocks's story?
Sam: Never mind.
Carla: Ah, come on, Sam.
Norm: Why can't you tell us?
Carla: Yeah, what's the big deal?
Coach: Take it easy, will you? Sam's kind of shy about this sort of thing, so I'll fill you in. She's a hooker.
Sam: She's not a hooker.
Coach: Well, no, she's not a hooker in the traditional sense...
Sam: She's not a hooker at all.
Coach: Finest young lady I ever met. My head is killing me.

Sam: Look. Look, she does not want to be bothered. She's waiting for her fiance. They're going down to the Caribbean tonight to get married. OK?
[As Diane returns from the bathroom, the patrons applaud]
Sam: They missed you.

Diane: Oh, Sumner, I'm so glad to see you. I've been sitting here listening to these men argue over the sweatiest movie ever made.
Sumner: Cool Hand Luke.
Cliff: Hey, that's one!

Diane: What happened to you? You said ten minutes, it's been over an hour.
Sumner: Diane, that woman is extraordinary.
Diane: Did she give you the ring?
Sumner: I couldn't take it.
Diane: We've got a plane to catch, right?
Sumner: Diane, I love you. But when I was with Barbara just now, something stirred inside me.
Diane: Well, we can talk about it on the flight to Barbados.
Sumner: I can't fly to Barbados this confused.
Diane: Sumner, it's OK, the pilot knows the way.
Sumner: [laughs] Oh, I love your wit. Oh, you're a beautiful child.
Diane: Let's go to Barbados.
Sumner: Let's go to Barbados.

Carla: [phone rings] Who isn't here?
[All the men raise their hands]
Men: Me.

Carla: [answers phone] Cheers. Just a minute. Hey, hey. If you're not, I apologize, but is your name Sumner Sloane?
Sumner: Yes, it is. [Carla laughs as Sumner takes the phone] Hello? No, no, no, it's all right. She understands and I understand. Oh, Barbara, that's very human of you. I'll be right over. And, Barbara, your depth frightens me. She insists that you have the ring.
Diane: Sumner, we won't have time to catch our flight.
Sumner: You call and get us on a later flight. I'll go now and get the ring.
Diane: Sumner?
Sumner: Yes?
Diane: How about a kiss?
Sumner: Maybe. I'll play it by ear.