Jacob: And that is one of the many ways that My Octopus Teacher made me, well, believe in love again. [Barbara and Melissa are silent] Is everything okay? The only time I saw you two sit apart is when Melissa said you should put sugar on grits.
Barbara: There's nothing to talk about.
Melissa: Yeah, 'cause it's very straightforward. We're under attack, and she's got her head buried in the sand.
Barbara: Better the sand than the mud.
Melissa: Okay. You refusing to cooperate doesn't stop bad things from happening. We should be using people doing bad stuff to do good stuff for our kids.
Jacob: Mm. "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."
Melissa: You know, usually when you quote stuff, it's annoying and I want you to shut up, but in this case, very relevant.
Jacob: Oh, thank you. I have another.
Melissa: No, you don't.
Jacob: No, I don't.

Ava: What are y'all doing here?
Janine: You didn't think we would give up that easy, did you?
Ava: That's exactly what I thought. I'm genuinely surprised to see you.
Janine: Okay. So, you know how your presentation used those robotablets?
Ava: My assistants, yes.
Gregory: Well, what if we were your assistants? That way, we can handle all the data and graphs, and you can handle the showmanship.
Ava: I love it! This is like a group project at school where I bring the energy, and you guys bring... whatever doesn't require a personality. This is a good idea.

Gregory: Hey. Thought I was early.
Janine: You are. I'm just earlier.
Gregory: Ava here yet?
Janine: She's probably somewhere doing power poses. Actually, it's been a minute. Let me check and make sure she hasn't bolted.

Janine: So, after Gregory talks math competency, I'll handle the attendance graph, and then I'll kick it to you for testing numbers.
Ava: So I'm the grand finale. But what if they want an encore?
Janine: That's okay. We'll handle all surprises, and all you have to do is take care of the lobs.
Ava: Oh, perfect! I'll go into a power pose. [chuckles]

Superintendent Collins: Ah, Principal Coleman.
Ava: Superintendent Collins. I'm really looking forward to showing you our presentation.
Superintendent Collins: W-What do you mean "our"?
Ava: I've enlisted two of Abbott's best teachers to help me with the presentation... Our shortest and our finest.
Superintendent Collins: [chuckles] No, you're not, slick. You'll be giving today's presentation alone. [whispers indistinctly] [walks away]
Janine: Uh, oh, my God. What did he just say to you? That if you don't do well, you're gonna get fired?
Ava: Worse. He mumbled and I didn't hear it.

Jacob: I can't really hear anything.
Melissa: Okay, get away from the door. Let me try. Yeah, I can't hear anything, either. Who's got the biggest ears? [all look at Gregory]
Gregory: I... I'ma just... [walks away]
Jacob: I'll get a glass.

Melissa: Did you... Did you shake someone down for me?
Barbara: I shook someone down for us, ya big gabootz. [off Melissa's look] Guboonza? Garbanzo.
Melissa: Yeah, that's a bean, but thank you for trying.
Barbara: [laughs]
[aside to camera:]
Barbara: Sometimes you try something new for the people you care about. The Lord helps those who help themselves. And He punishes those who have been helping themselves to the church's petty cash. Mnh-mnh-mnh.

Ava: I saw your little e-mail.
Gregory: I know. That's why I'm sitting here.
Ava: Are you sure you wanna do this? This job requires you to be cool and level-headed, and you ain't exactly known for keeping your composure.
Gregory: I'm sure.
Ava: This job means more responsibility. Commitment. Emotional availability.
Gregory: I understand.
Ava: Well, welcome to teaching full-time at Abbott, Mr. Eddie.
Gregory: Thank you.
[As they shake hands, Ava holds onto Gregory for longer than appropriate]
Gregory: What I'm looking forward to the most is having access to the H.R. department. [exits]
Ava: [to camera] What's H.R.?

[Janine walks into the music classroom as the children play "Amazing Grace" on recorders]
Ms. Davis: Ms. Teagues, are you chewing gum?
Janine: Yeah.
Ms. Davis: Where does gum go when you enter this classroom?
Children: Wanda the Waste Basket!
Janine: Okay. All right, come on, my future little Odd Futures. Time to go back to our classroom. [playing continues] Uh, come on, guys. You'll see Ms. Davis next week. [sighs] Hey, guys. I know music class is fun, but that's why we have to let someone else have a turn. [playing continues] All right, guys, you know what? Don't make me collect the recorders, 'cause if I collect them, who knows when you're gonna see them again. [music stops as Ms. Davis gestures]
Mr. Johnson: [sings] ♪ That saved a wretch like me ♪ ♪ I once was lost ♪

Janine: So sorry I'm late. Oh, glad you guys started without me.
Melissa: We weren't waiting.
Barbara: This isn't a restaurant.