Michael Scott Quote #2038
Quote from Michael Scott in WUPHF.com
Michael Scott: The world sends people your way. Ryan came to me through a temp agency. Andy was transferred here. No idea where Creed came from. The point is you just have to play with the cards that you're dealt. Jim, that guy is an ace. Dwight is my king up my sleeve. Phyllis is my old maid. Oscar is my queen. That's easy. Gimme a hard one. That's what Oscar said. Toby is the instruction card you throw away. Pam's a solid seven. And yeah, you know what? Ryan is probably, like, a two. But sometimes twos can be wild. So watch out. And I am obviously the joker. So... [phone rings, computer chimes, dog barks] That's, uh...
Robotic Voice: WUPHF, from Ryan Howard. Decided to sell company. Thanks, bro. Hell of a ride
Michael Scott: Thank God.
Features in the collection: That's What She Said.
The Office Quotes
‘That's What She Said’
Quote from Michael Scott in Finale
Jim: Either way, Dwight, I can't be there for you. I'm sorry.
Dwight K. Schrute: Jim.
Jim: I just really wish there was something I could do. [looks off into the distance]
Dwight K. Schrute: [turns around] Michael. I can't believe you came.
Michael Scott: That's what she said.
Jim: [to camera] Best prank ever.
Quote from Michael Scott in Viewing Party
Gabe: Michael, you are making this harder than it has to be.
Michael Scott: That's what she said.
‘WUPHF.com’ Quotes
Quote from Stanley
Stanley: Yes, I have a dream. And it's not some M.L.K. Dream for Equality. I want to own a decommissioned lighthouse. And I want to live at the top. And nobody knows I live there. And there's a button that I can press, and it'll launch that lighthouse into space.
Quote from Jim
[Jim sits at his desk and phones Gabe with his doctored audio of Jo ready:]
Gabe: [answering phone] Gabe Lewis.
Jo: Now listen here, Gabe, you're too fat. No one's gonna like you if you're too fat. I made some changes to my book. See if you like them.
Gabe: Well, Jo-
Jo: Now, I love reading and I hate being interrupted. Shut up and listen, you gay bastard. Chapter One. I was born, not into luxury, nor poverty. But into adversity, and for that, I thank the Lord. My father was a man. That's all we can know. After I learned to ride a bike, there was no stopping me. I would ride up Magnolia Street and down Azalea Lane. Which would later become my paper round.
Jim: [opens door to Gabe's office] All right, good night, Gabe. Just wanted to say thanks again. 'cause I really think I made good use of my day. Oh, sorry.
Jo: I have always been a fighter. And fate has obliged me with plenty of battles, the first being a hard-
Quote from Gabe
Gabe: Is this job really about the money for you, Jim? I mean, isn't this where you fell in love?
Jim: A commission cap takes away my incentive to sell. So you realize I now have no reason to work, right?
Gabe: When you're dealing with a large organization, sometimes you have to put up with policies you don't like. I wish my gym didn't allow full nudity in the locker room. Okay, seeing these old guys walking around naked feels almost passive-aggressive. But I deal with it. 'Cause it's policy. See what I mean?
Jim: Nope.
Gabe: Nudity makes me uncomfortable.
Jim: Okay.
Gabe: My gym allows it. I wish they didn't, but it's policy. So I respect it, and I just keep a low- You know, I look away. Think about your commission cap as a naked old man in a gym locker room.