Mike: Is this one of those nuggets of happiness you were talking about? And by the way, why the hell isn't Gary out here enjoying this nugget with us?
Frankie: Because he's in his room working.
Mike: He's a chiropractor. What could he possibly be working on?

Janet: It's just such a bummer, 'cause it was her favorite toy.
Frankie: Oh, she'll get over it. Stick a couple cookies in her mouth, she'll be fine.
Janet: Yeah, it's just so unlike Lucy to leave a toy outside. She's usually really, really responsible.
Frankie: Kids. What are you gonna do, right?
Janet: Right. Anyway, the bear was $60, and you can get him at the toy store at the mall.

Frankie: Mike, are you awake?
Mike: What do you think?
Frankie: I really think Janet wants me to pay for that bear.
Mike: That's 'cause she does.
Frankie: I can't believe she could act this way. I just think it's so wrong.
Mike: So tell her that.
Frankie: Oh, maybe I should just give her the money.
Mike: Sounds great.
Frankie: No. You know what? I'm not giving her the money.
Mike: Mm.
Frankie: She and Gary are doing very well, and she knows we couldn't even afford to fix our roof. We can't afford to just throw away 60 bucks.
Mike: I will give you 75 right now to stop this conversation.

Frankie: You know what makes me mad?
Mike: Well, it's not waking up your husband. That's for sure.
Frankie: She's questioning our son's honesty. Brick said he didn't do it, he didn't do it. He didn't do it, did he?
Brick: I didn't do it.
Frankie: Brick, this is a private conversation.
Sue: No, it's not.
Axl: Wish it was.
Brick: I didn't do it.
Mike: Hey, hey. Everybody pipe down. It's almost 6:00 in the morning. I'd like to get two seconds' sleep before the sun comes up on another TV-less day.
Tag: [opens the curtains] Happy Thanksgiving!

Pat: Uh, the defrosting seems to have sucked a little taste out of the food and Tag's used up all the butter, so I'm gonna need someone to run to the store.
Mike: Got it.
Axl: On it.

Janet: Ooh, Brick, can you be careful with that frame? That's one of Grandma's favorites.
Frankie: He can pick up the frame, Janet.
Janet: Oh, okay, sure. But remember that one time when he broke Mom's antique vase?
Frankie: That was when he was 5. He's 10 now. He's fine.
Janet: Sure, but he still has his issues, right?
Frankie: What do you mean, issues?
Janet: Well, you know, he's got his things. He's, like, special.
Frankie: Brick's not special. He's perfectly normal. Don't worry about anything, Brick.You're fine.
[Brick almost drops the frame as he tries to place it back on the shelf]

Frankie: So I think she wants me to buy her a new bear.
Pat: Did she say that?
Frankie: Well, not exactly, but you know her tone, Mom. There was a definite tone. And it's not even the money that bothers me. It's the judgment.
Pat: I'm just happy to have both my girls home for the holiday.

Janet: I'm just saying, since he's the one who broke it, they should step up and, you know, pay for...
Frankie: Hey.
Janet: Hey.
Frankie: What are you guys talking about?
Janet: Oh. We were just discussing how to prepare the corn.
Frankie: Oh, really?
Janet: Mm-hmm.
Frankie: 'Cause the corn is my job. So if the corn is being discussed, it's sort of weird that I'm not part of the corn discussion, isn't it?

Janet: Hey. Are you sleeping?
Frankie: I'm just trying to take a little nap.
Janet: Oh. Okay. Just because you said you were gonna do the corn, so...
Frankie: Yeah. I'm a little tired. I haven't been getting much sleep down here in my bedroom.
Janet: You know what? I offered to give you the guest room when you got here.
Frankie: Oh, yeah. It was a nice offer. "Oh, I just thought it would be best for everybody, you know, with Lucy's naps."
Janet: For your information, Lucy's pediatrician said she needs a quiet environment to sleep in.
Frankie: Oh, really? She doesn't sleep well?
Janet: Yeah.
Frankie: 'Cause I thought the miracle baby just hovered over her bed on a magical cloud.

Janet: Oh. And there it is. You know what? You have always resented Lucy because you never wanted another mom having a reason to be tired.
Frankie: What?!
Janet: Oh, you're always so worn out, Frankie, and you love it because you're a martyr. Every time I call you on the phone, you never have time to talk because you're so overwhelmed. Well, guess what? I'm tired, too!
Frankie: You think you're more tired than me?
Janet: Yeah, I know that I am. As a matter of fact, maybe I'll just lie around now, too. How about that?
Frankie: Oh, no. No. How could you be tired? You've got one kid. I've got three! Not to mention a full-time job and a house to keep clean.
Janet: Oh, right. You're all about the clean house. Look, we're just about to have Thanksgiving dinner, and it looks like a bomb got dropped in here.
Frankie: You want me to clean up? Fine. Fine. I'll clean up. Here. Here we go. I'm cleaning the hell up! Is that clean enough for you?
Janet: Perfect!
Frankie: Maybe I'll even make my bed.
Janet: Hey, there's a first time for everything.