[flashback:]
Rose: I don't understand how people can run around showing their naked bodies to total strangers. It's disgusting.
Dorothy: It's sickening.
Blanche: It's terrible. Yoo-hoo!
Dorothy: Blanche, would you please get away from that window for two seconds?

[flashback:]
Blanche: Come here. I want you to see this guy playing volleyball.
Dorothy: Blanche, will you stop acting like a teenager? You have seen naked men before. What is the big deal? Whoa. Is that a legal serve?

[flashback:]
Blanche: All right. Then I say we just cast caution to the wind, get butt naked and have a good time.
Dorothy: If I had a dollar for every time you said that, I'd be a wealthy woman.

Blanche: Oh, look, what are we sitting around here all depressed about? Just 'cause it's Valentine's Day and our dates dumped us?
Dorothy: Yes, Blanche.
Blanche: I just wanted to hear it out loud before I had another bowl of ice cream.

Dorothy: We're not the only women in the world who don't have dates on Valentine's Day. Ma, you wanna join us?
Sophia: I can't. I have a date.
Rose: You do?
Dorothy: She's making that up to annoy us.
Sophia: No, I'm not. I have a date.
Dorothy: What's his name?
Sophia: I can't tell you.
Dorothy: Have I met him?
Sophia: No, he's from outta town.
Dorothy: Where is he taking you?
Sophia: I'm not allowed to say. Security reasons.
Dorothy: Ma, none of this is true.
Sophia: OK. I'll tell you. It's Julio Iglesias. You satisfied?
Dorothy: We'll make the reservation for four. She'll tell us the truth when she gets hungry.

[flashback:]
Bartender: Our finest champagne and two glasses. Very romantic.
Blanche: Well, it is St. Valentine's Day, after all. You can pour both of them. I'm not expecting anybody.
Bartender: It is St. Valentine's Day, lady, not St. Patrick's Day.
Blanche: Oh, I'm not gonna drink them both. I'm just celebrating. My husband proposed to me in this very bar on St. Valentine's Day. After that, we sort of made it a tradition and came back every year, so since he passed away I've just continued the tradition by myself.

Sophia: Well, my date'll be here soon. I'd better get ready.
Dorothy: Oh, Ma, will you knock it off?
Sophia: Ah, you're right. At 82 what am I gonna get ready? I always have my purse, and I shouldn't pee until he's got the motor running.

Dorothy: I was never so embarrassed in my entire life.
Rose: But it did turn out to be a lovely Valentine's cruise.
Blanche: Well, it did not. We never even had to use those condoms.
Rose: You didn't? I used every one of mine. Late at night I filled 'em with water and threw 'em at the people in the limbo line.

Dorothy: Ma, I bet you were in on this all along, weren't you?
Sophia: Of course I was. These dimwits' idea of romance is a Coors Light and a Love Boat rerun.

Sophia: Julio?
Julio Iglesias: Hello, Sophia.
Sophia: Why didn't you use the front door?
Julio Iglesias: I didn't want to be seen.
Sophia: Well, what's the point in going out with Julio Iglesias if no one's gonna see us? Now, once we hit Woolfie's deli, I'd appreciate it if you'd serenade me with "Begin the Beguine."
Julio Iglesias: All right. We sing together.