Blanche: Anyway, the important thing is to stay partners and finish our book.
Rose: Forget it. There isn't gonna be any book.
Blanche: Now what are you saying?
Rose: Did I just lapse into Swedish? Read it and weep.
Blanche: "Tales of Toonder the Tiger and His Friends, by Hans Christian Lockerhueven." Well, who's Hans Christian Lockerhueven?
Rose: Only St. Olaf's greatest author. He wrote the classic fairy tale, "Hansel and Hansel."
Blanche: You told me your parents made up these stories.
Rose: I thought they did, but when I called my sister for more stories, she suggested I pick up the book that Mom and Dad got them from.
Blanche: This is great. We've been writing stories that have already been written.
Rose: Well, if it's any consolation, they do it all the time on Mr. Belvedere.

Rose: What are you doing?
Blanche: Oh, just doodling. What do you think?
Rose: Let's see. Oh, it's a tiger. With multicolored stripes, wearing a tuxedo, a top hat, and holding a magic wand. Oh, my gosh, it's Toonder the magnificent tiger.
Blanche: Yes. I've been thinking about him ever since you told us that fable. You know how it is when you just can't get something out of your head?
Rose: Oh, yeah, water's the worst. That's why I always wear earplugs when I shampoo.

Dorothy: Ma's 82 years old. Edith was only six years older. You can guess what I'm thinking.
Blanche: You're thinking your time with Sophia may be running short.
Rose: Wow, Blanche. That's amazing. Now guess what I'm thinking.

Rose: Well, Dorothy, did you get anything out of this?
Dorothy: Actually, I did get an idea. You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna take Ma away for the weekend to a cabin in the Florida Keys, where we can spend some quality time together.
Blanche: You got that idea from her fable?
Dorothy: No, I got it from this brochure somebody left on the table. But I'll tell you, I never would've read it if her fable hadn't bored me to tears. Thank you, Rose.
Rose: You're welcome.

Dorothy: Look, Ma, all I want us to do is go away together, just the two of us. Ma, we'll go anywhere you want to go.
Sophia: Great. I want to go to Disney World.
Dorothy: Then that's where we're going.
Sophia: Oh? All of a sudden you're gonna take me after I've been asking for years?
Dorothy: That's right.
Sophia: Leave your shoe sizes and let me know whether you want your moccasins in brown or black.

Sophia: [on the phone] Oh, hello. This is Dorothy Zbornak. I'd like to confirm my reservation on flight 505 to Orlando. Uh-huh. Uh, now, let's go over the arrangements I made to have my mother taken away at the departure gate. You don't know what I'm talking about? Neither do I. Goodbye.
Dorothy: Hi, Ma. Are you ready to go?
Sophia: You bet, pussycat.
Dorothy: I'm glad you stopped being so suspicious.
Sophia: Oh, please, if you can't trust family, who can you trust?

Sophia: Space Mountain, here I come.
Dorothy: Ma, I told you, no scary rides.
Sophia: Then we'd better find another way to get to the airport. The cabby is wearing a turban.

Dorothy: Ma, why can't you make me happy? I want to do this.
Sophia: OK, OK, if a trip down memory lane is gonna make you happy, pussycat, I'm willing to take a short stroll.
Dorothy: Listen, I'll tell you what we'll do. We'll order dinner in, we'll finish looking at the photos, and then we can reread these old letters.
Sophia: Gee, it's too bad you didn't bring along the slides.
Dorothy: Ma, now you've got the spirit! [pulls out projector]

Rose: Oh, but I can't tell you, Blanche, how much I enjoy working with you.
Blanche: Me too. You know why? 'Cause we're not just partners, we're friends.
Rose: We're good friends. I feel I could say anything to you.
Blanche: Of course you can, sugarplum.
Rose: Even criticize your artwork.
Blanche: Well, of course. The whole point of collaborating is to get beyond our egos and come up with something we both like. What do you think?
Rose: Well, this could use a few minor changes.
Blanche: Drop dead.

Rose: Blanche, whatever happened to getting beyond your ego?
Blanche: My ego has nothing to do with it. These drawings are brilliant.
Rose: Blanche, I have lived with these characters all my life and I'm the one who determines if your drawings are brilliant, and that one needs work.
Blanche: What's wrong with it?
Rose: Well, you forgot Melvin the loneliest sea otter's little beanie with the propeller on top.
Blanche: No, I didn't. It blew away.
Rose: It did not.
Blanche: It did too. Big wind came along, blew it right off his head.
Rose: That couldn't have happened.
Blanche: I say it did and you're gonna write it in the story.
Rose: And what if I refuse?
Blanche: You see this eraser? I'm going to rub out Melvin's little friend, Mookie the sailor.
Rose: You wouldn't.
Blanche: Try me.