‘Dateline: Miami’
Season 7, Episode 7 - Aired November 2, 1991
When Dorothy has a date on a Saturday night, Rose, Blanche and Sophia spend the night reminiscing about some of their worst dates.
Quote from Rose
[flashback:]
Blanche: Wait! But I didn't get my New Year's kiss, and it's almost midnight! Darn it. I gotta kiss somebody at midnight.
TV Announcer: Five, four, three, two, one Happy New Year!
Rose: Don't even think about it.
Quote from Sophia
Blanche: Gosh, it's gettin' late. I bet it's after 1:00 and Dorothy's not home. I guess Dr. Kagan's turning out to be wonderful.
Rose: Or maybe he drugged her and sold her into white slavery.
Sophia: Either way, I'm glad she's out of the house.
Quote from Sophia
[flashback:]
Myron: I finished stacking those crates for you, Mrs. Petrillo.
Sophia: Thank you, Myron. You're a good kid. In fact, before you go, I'd like to have a little talk with you. Sit. As you know, Myron, I've always thought of you as a bright, polite young man. Talented, ambitious, smart...
Myron: I'm not going out with your daughter, Mrs. Petrillo.
Sophia: You've got to, Myron. She's spending too much time with this yutz named Zbornak. She has to see what a real date is like.
Myron: I'm sorry, Mrs. Petrillo. She's just not my type.
Sophia: I see. Uh, how about Mr. Hamilton. Is he your type?
Quote from Sophia
[flashback:]
Myron: Uh, Dorothy, I was wondering if you would do me the honor of going out with me tomorrow night?
Sophia: Well, what do you say, Dorothy?
Dorothy: I'm pregnant.
Myron: This is gonna cost a lot more.
Sophia: Deal's off, Myron. You better go.
Myron: Okay. But what about this?
Sophia: Hush money.
Quote from Sophia
[flashback:]
Stan: Honestly, Mrs. Petrillo, I don't know how this happened.
Sophia: Hmm, let's see. Did you both drink out of the same cup?
Quote from Sophia
[flashback:]
Sophia: Oh, God, Dorothy, we've gotta get you married.
Dorothy: Stan's asked me to marry him.
Sophia: But who? Who could we get? Who? Who? Who?
Dorothy: I told Stan yes.
Sophia: Did you sign anything?
Quote from Dorothy
Dorothy: Well, doesn't anyone want to hear how my date turned out?
Blanche: Oh, honey, was it just terrible?
Rose: Oh, sweetheart, you can tell us.
Dorothy: It was wonderful.
Sophia: Really? Where is Dr. Marvelous? What kind of a man doesn't walk a girl to the door?
Dorothy: One who's too exhausted to walk.
Blanche: Dorothy Zbornak, I am shocked, and I want details.
Dorothy: I tell you the night was just magical. We laughed, we danced, we drank, we cried, we did it all. Even... No, I can't tell you. I'm too shy.