Ren: Oh. Bummer news. I couldn't get those tickets to The Clash.
Barry: I don't know why you like those guys. They're so angry. You're rock stars. How about a smile?
Ren: Well, then I guess you're gonna be super excited for this.
Barry: That tee's way too big for you.
Ren: It's not for me, dummy. It's for my boyfriend.
Barry: You have a boyfriend? [sighs] This day was bound to come. Please give him my highest regards. He's a very lucky man.
Ren: Barry, hear my words. You are my boyfriend, and I am your girlfriend.
Barry: You're just gonna say it like that?
Ren: If you haven't noticed, we've been spending all of our time together, and you're the first person I want to see in the morning and the last one that I want to talk to at night.
Barry: That's exactly how I feel! We are boyfriend and girlfriend.

Lainey: You look good, Barry.
Barry: Thanks. It's a new shirt.
Ren: And, uh, I'm the one that gave it to him. I'm Ren.
Barry: Ren! I'm so sorry. It's like you weren't even there for a second.
Ren: hat's how it felt.
Barry: Ren, Lainey. Lainey, Ren. Her, me, together. Friend, girl. So fun.
Ren: I-I'm his girlfriend.
Barry: That's what she's saying, and I'm saying it, too, because I like it my way. Burger King.
Erica: Okay, well, we should probably go before his skull collapses.
Lainey: Nice meeting you, Ren. And, Barry... Bye, I guess.
Barry: Goodbye to you, lady from my past!

Beverly: Well, I don't accept it. Brea and Adam are moving way too fast.
Murray: Bevy, relax. Everybody gets older. Just let 'em be.
Beverly: Murray, it is a father's duty to scare the hormonal passions out of any suitor that comes to our children's door.
Murray: Here's the thing... Nah.

Pops: Adam, you need to get downstairs. Your mother's grilling your lady friend like a flank steak.
Adam: Oh, balls!

Adam: Brea, leave your purse and flee!
Brea: No, Adam, it's fine. We're having a good time. Your mom's gonna teach me how to put cheddar on cod.
Adam: No! Don't connect in a meaningful way!
Beverly: Too late! We're sisters. People are already saying it. [chuckles] I'll be back with those recipes.
Adam: [to Brea] I know you're a wonderful person and would do anything for me, but not this.
Brea: It's really okay. Your mom's obviously having a hard time, so it's good that she likes me.
Adam: Rather than take the time to explain, we should run outta here.
Beverly: Here's your signed edition of my cookbook, Brea. It's the first time I wrote "best wishes" and actually meant it. Let me get my car keys, and we'll go.
Adam: Go?
Brea: I kinda invited your mom along tonight.
Adam: Let me guess... You didn't think she'd actually accept?
Beverly: But I did. And we're not gonna do any of that boring adult stuff. We're gonna go see a dumb movie and then go to the arcade. Yay! Three's a crowd... of fun!
Adam: Brea, I think you're special and amazing, but you have no idea how much you just [bleep] us.

Barry: Jenkintown Posse.
All: Jenkintown Posse.
Barry: I need your infinite guidance and wisdom. Matt Bradley, you're free to leave at any time.
Matt: I kinda live here, buddy.
Barry: Enough interruptions, okay? I'm in real trouble. I'm currently embroiled in a love triangle with the two most beautiful women on the planet.
Andy: Oh, uh, Rae Dawn Chong and the twins from the beer commercial?
Naked Rob: That would be three, doofus. I'm going with two Dana Delanys.
Matt: She could swim to my China Beach anytime.

Barry: Did you hear that? She needs me.
Matt: She said she needs to talk to you.
Barry: With her body. What aren't you getting, Matt Bradley? Her vague and mysterious message is crystal clear... She wants all this.
Matt: It is kinda weird, but you're with Ren now.
Barry: Damn my seductive charms! Sometimes I'm too much man for even me.

Adult Adam: [v.o.] Turns out wedging herself between me and Brea was only the beginning.
Adam: Good night, Mom.
Beverly: Good night? But we haven't hit the arcade yet or gone out for a slice of pie.
Adam: That doesn't seem like something we'd want to do.
Beverly: Is that true, Brea?
Brea: Well, I...
Beverly: Ah, two against one! Let's go!

Adult Adam: [v.o.] Yep, that night, Brea and I had the most memorable date of our lives, but not in a good way.
Beverly: Oh, look out! It's the police!
Adam: Where?
Beverly: The tickle police.
Adam: Stop it! The teenage manager's gonna come yell at us again!
Beverly: Oh, let him!

Adult Adam: [v.o.] And it didn't look like my mom was gonna run out of gas anytime soon.
Beverly: Unh-uh-uh-uh-uh. No dairy for you. Not with that tum-tum. Actually, I'll take the peaches, too. Go to town on some crust.
Adult Adam: [v.o.] Eventually, we managed to escape to a cramped photo booth.
Adam: On three, two... Mom!
Adult Adam: [v.o.] Yep, even when we tried to get away, my mom was always in the picture.